Firstly, I would like to say I appreciate honesty. I am not targeting people who have been through this and I am not trying to be cynical. Step into my shoes and try to understand what I’m about to tell you.

At some point in our lives we have heard the phrase, “I can’t live without you”. It is common amongst those who are in relationships. When a girl is parting ways with a guy because he did something to hurt her, he apologises by saying, “I’m sorry. I can’t live without you… I won’t do it again.” We have all heard it, be it in real life or in the movies. Now, boy, you came in to this world alone, you’re going to the grave alone. If you cheated on me how does that qualify as ‘You can’t live without me?’. I fail to understand the concept of those words. Then again I haven’t been in love – yet.

I have tried to listen to people telling their points of view on the matter. They either say they were too blinded by love to see what has been in front of them all along or that they thought the person could change. People don’t change, they evolve, be it for good or for bad.

We get all types of messed up people in this world: the serial cheaters, the abusers, the pathological liars and the list goes on, for both sexes. We can’t say it is the men only, we have to generalise.

How often do we come across new people and wonder what their intentions are? I can tell you I question every new person I meet. They say it’s better to be safe than sorry, unless you get yourself a charming or beautiful pathological liar. If God granted bizarre wishes, I’d wish to read people’s thoughts, that way I’d know what to expect. That would be total chaos.

Back to ‘I can’t live without you’. How can we know if it’s real or fake? The following is a list of what humans can’t live without:

Oxygen
Water
Food

Do you see a person’s name there?

This is how they trick us. They tell us we are the most important people in their lives, then they continue to do wrong and end up saying they will die when you leave them. Is that the life you want to live? People need to understand that when things get toxic they need to leave! How many of our brothers and sisters have to end up in body bags for us to open our eyes? I understand that people fall in love, people trust and people follow blindly, but how do people lose common sense? How do we lose virtue, self-respect and in severe cases, our minds. I’m only saying this in my perspective. I’m perplexed, help me understand.

I will end off by saying do not lose sight of yourself when you start falling in love, because that’s how you lose yourself trying to put someone on a pedestal that puts them before you. Heartache is inevitable, but it disappears when you truly respect yourself. That’s what romance stories have taught me. If you feel like you are drowning in relationship that is not going anywhere, reflect. It can be the best thing that can happen to you. Think clearly upon making decisions and try to put yourself before others when the going gets tough.

It is not the end of the world yet.

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