What does it really mean to be a breadwinner?
Does it mean taking care of your family members until there’s no more to give or sacrificing what you have even when you have some responsibility of your own? Well then if it is, then it’s a burden that is way beyond your strength to carry on your shoulders. No one was chosen to be a breadwinner, but we all want to change our family situations, even though it is not easy to walk through it.
Some of us dropped out of school because of the responsibility at home and ended up working from a young age. Some of us end up leaving the area where we grew up to look for a better future somewhere else. Some of us managed to change the situation at home, but some never got a chance to make changes in their family.
They have tried giving all they could according to their strength. The burden they carry on their shoulders is too heavy for them. They can’t provide enough and survive at the same time because living is too much for them.
No matter how educated you are, you can still be the only one who works in the family. You will feel the heavy weight on your shoulders. Your lifestyle will have to change. Whatever you do you’ll always think about the situation back at home.
The pressure you always get from your parents is the one that makes your life a living hell, especially when it’s payday for you. You won’t have time to sort out your needs. The phone will ring right and left, and you’ll get disturbing text messages that might drive you mad. You can’t think straight, you can’t do what you want or maybe buy something nice for yourself.
You will sacrifice whatever little you have for your family back at home, but I’m telling you still that isn’t enough. Your family or maybe your parents will not always want to understand when you say you can’t help them this time because you have your own problems to sort out. I’m telling you that’s when hell breaks loose.
That’s when you’ll see that your family loves you only when you provide. Even your birth parents, they are the same. They can turn their back on you.
You will feel how heavy it is to be a breadwinner. You might even have suicidal thoughts.
I don’t blame people who don’t spend holidays with their family members. Its’s not like they don’t want to go; they are home sick to be there with everybody sharing some meals and creating good memories.
You’d say that they hate their home. No they don’t hate home, it’s just that no one is interested in them when they have nothing to offer. They will be a laughing stock whenever they show up at home with nothing but their luggage bag. There will be words like, “What were you doing the whole year?” When they forget that the whole your you were the one putting bread on the table for them.
Now you have nothing to offer but to return home since your life from where you were is too tough to handle, so you’re forced to return home to start over. You may get depressed or maybe get a stroke by just listening to the negative things they will say about you.
If this is the fate of being a breadwinner, I’d rather not be one. But you can’t choose not to be. If only the family members or the parents will be more supportive and understanding when their children say, “This time I won’t be able to help with whatever I was given.”
The time has come for me to focus on my future while I still have strength. That might make a difference and most of us breadwinners will feel the burdens we’ve carried, fade away.
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