It doesn’t matter whether you believe it or not, whether you see it or choose to ignore it, but the truth is that the clock is always ticking.
I remember back when I was a kid, I used to think that I would always stay young and that I had my whole life ahead of me. Growing up has actually made me realise that the clock isn’t waiting for anyone. Whether I move or stand still, it ticks — tick-tock tick-tock.
I have been told that I am not getting any younger and I should do this and I should do that. I have been told how I should behave and how not to, been told that as a woman I am supposed to do this, sit like this, dress like this and in order for me to be socially accepted, I should behave in a certain manner. Yeah, sure, I can behave like I have been told but am I happy with it? Am I living for me? Am I pleasing me? Definitely not. It took a very long time for me to actually realise that I wasn’t living my life but that of society. I lived a life that everyone else was happy with except me.
Society has made us believe that if you wear a wig and put on makeup, then you become a woman no man would want to marry. I have grown up and I have actually understood that the clock isn’t waiting for anyone. If you feel that you need to put on make-up today, do it fearlessly so. If you want to wear that wig, do it and be your best self. Time waits for no man and life is way too short for me to be busy minding what is being said about me rather than what I think and feel about myself.
Life has no rules, but you create them for yourself. Living your best life starts with accepting yourself and doing more of what actually makes you happy. It starts with you giving yourself the permission to be yourself and putting yourself first. It doesn’t come with manuals, but societal expectations.
I had to learn it the hard way, after losing my self-confidence, thinking that I am not enough and that I shouldn’t do certain things, I actually realised that whatever is meant for me will never miss me whether I am wearing a wig or natural hair.
I have tortured myself for a long time because I had been told that I could never measure up to anything. I was told by my aunt that I would never make it to Grade 12 because I seemed to be living in a high paced life. It was in that moment when I realised that there is more to me than I have been led to believe, that being a woman doesn’t make me less of a human being. That I am capable and that it doesn’t matter what I wear as long as I am comfortable in it. Whether anyone believed in me or not, I am enough.
Everyone who showed me all the bad things about myself gave me a reason to want to be better and I am a better person than I was years ago. I have learned to be patient with myself, I have learned to accept me for who I am. Ever since I realised that I am human despite whatever I am perceived as, I have become a happier being because now I am living a life I am pleased with.
Time waits for no man, if you feel you need to do something, then do it today because tomorrow is not guaranteed.
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