The answer is in the actions and the question is rhetorical. What was it? I do not think Albert could explain it because it defied all the laws of physics. Moving at the speed of light where nothing lasts long.

A baby was our two-year plan, now we are both in pain and we did not make it past the second month. I do not think I was going to marry you, I know I was. Bury you if the Lord decided to take you first, while I raise my fist and yell “I had her first” .

Those moments we spent together were nothing short of how I envisioned the rest of my life with you by my side as my wife. I do not want to talk about what could have or would have been, I just know it was perfect for me. I cannot speak for you so I can only hope it was the same for you two.

” People joined together by love become a unit and grow together”, I do not recall where I heard it or where I read it but that is all I ever wanted for us. I wanted your problems to be our problems and for us to make it through them together as one, the same goes for my problems. I wanted us to support each other and be there for one another.

I thought you were my last girlfriend and that the next one was going to need 9 months plus a couple of years from you to teach her what makes me happy because you did it with so much love and finesse. Not forgetting the little Queen and her fresh smell as she would tell you if you asked. Maybe as I am writing this down I never showed you all of that? only Nonna knows the answer.

You once said to me after we reconciled over an argument we had, that you were willing to drive this boat as long as I two was willing. 9 May came and you texted me you had nothing to say to me and you were feeling like giving up on us, that turned my heart into a glass that fell a long way from the ground.

Our love boat was sinking and you were not willing to give us a try, you were not willing to fight for our love. Those words you said hurt me and they made me give up, leaving our boat to sink like the Titanic. I love you and I am not afraid to tell you or say it to the world. Perfect I am not and I do not try to be so I settle with just being myself. When I said we were over it was not because I did not love you anymore, it is because I love you so much more and you made me feel like we were not on the same page.

Now I am at the sea bed regretting and overthinking, but mostly though I will not lie I am missing you so much it hurts. I am sorry I let us get here and for everything else.

Yours Truly,
Sanele.