“If only I could go back in time. I wish they were still here. If only I chose me, I wouldn’t be here.” It’s the past you can’t change it. Yet now is your chance to choose yourself. The rest will follow.
Life has its funny ways of showing us how capable we really are. How wrong and unfair we have been. Who genuinely care and do not only say that for the sake of having to say that, but mean each and every word.
We are all suffering from something. It can either be getting over a long term relationship with someone you recently broke up with or a specific chronic illness etc. I mean we’ve all shed tears, felt pain, went mute upon hearing something that broke our feelings and sacrificed there and there. In our lives, these words are the same but are arranged differently. Hence we feel the same pain and only the reason behind the pain is what’s different.
It can be the departure of somebody you love, that one person who was able to see through you. Who was able to differentiate between your joy and pain. The same person who encouraged you to always do better. It can be that one romantic relationship that brought you back to life. Made you feel alive all over again and made you whole. The same relationship that rescued you from drowning in your sorrows. That motivated you and invested in producing a stronger version of yourself. Only to end up crushing you. That one lover who loved you with your flaws, struggle and shattered self. The same person who couldn’t make it with you to the present. You are now stuck between hanging on and letting go, blinded by the past and ignorant to the present.
The past will always be there. Either as a version of your life where you didn’t know better. Where things didn’t turn out the way you expected them to. A phase in your life where you failed to appreciate certain moments it brought to your attention. A time in life where you nearly lose yourself because love eventually became painful. It’s your past! It didn’t kill you but made you stronger. It’s a summary of the person you used to be and it’s either good or painful. As long as you leave that door open, it will always find a way to control your present. I am not saying you should forget about everything that pulled you down. All I am saying is, close that door behind you! Because the truth of the matter is, the past will always hurt you.