I looked at her as she smiled while looking at my report card. She was healthy,we were happy or so I thought. “I am proud of you,” she said.

“Mama , Ngiphasile,” I shouted.

“Go show your father,” she said. Rushing out the weather seemed gloomy and sad. Father had his hands on the steering wheel and his head faced down. He seemed to be carrying the world’s problems. But everything looked normal or so I thought.

Knock knock …

Baba lifted his head up, trying hard to smile. “What is it, my princess?” he asked.

“I passed Baba,” I said excitedly.

“Well done my baby, I will buy you a gift, just go back to your mother.”

The smoke from the kitchen welcomed me into the house. Why would Mama stay in this smoke? Rushing to her, my fragile heart could not have prepared me what my eyes saw. At that moment the world closed in on me, Mama had blood coming from her mouth.

“Call your father she softly asked. Baba came rushing. He picked her bridal style and if it were any other day I would have admired their love.

Dad drove out as if he were the only driver on the road . His mission was getting his love to the hospital. She was admitted and there was hope of her survival.

We went back home with uBaba, each one in their own zone. uBaba answered a call that changed our lives that instant when we got home.

Then there were the “I am sorrys” from people who had arrived. I don’t even know how fast they flew to my place. They just proved the reality I tried to avoid, my heart was shattered. She said she will never leave me, but she left, breaking my heart.

Since then my heart has been dysfunctional, filled with scars and wounds that refuse to heal.
If only they had prepared me for the scar death leaves in one’s heart, if only.