She’s an innocent little girl named Natasha. She grew up with no one and nothing. Her mother didn’t have time for her or her sisters. Her mother had time for drugs and sex. She was 4 years old and she was confused. She asked God everyday why her mommy didn’t love her.
Natasha always asked her mommy why she didn’t love her and her mother would always say “Because you’re worthless! You’re ugly and disgusting and you’re not my kid!” Natasha just cries, she didn’t understand why her mother would says the things that she says.
She was cold, hungry and scared. Her mother never fed her or her sisters. Instead her mother would sat there and eat in front of them, making her and her sisters smell the food but if they try to eat it, they knew they would get beaten,so they go to bed starving. Natasha stinked and was extremely dirty. Her mom didn’t pay any of the bills so she couldn’t take a bath.
Many days mommy brought home several guys. Natasha was scared because those guys were big. She remembers her mother calling her so she went to her mom. Her mother then instructed Natasha on what to do.
She knew that what she was doing was wrong but she did not want to upset mommy, so she did as she was told. She remembers the guy being big and smelly, and really mean. She didn’t know what he was doing to her but she knew it hurt.
She cried and cried but he slapped her and told her to shut up. So she laid in silence. She was in pain and she did not know what to do. She did not know what she did that was so bad that her mother would make some guy hurt her like that. This happened almost every night up until she was 7.
She was bruised and broken. Her innocence was ripped away from her. She was lost and confused. Natasha and her sisters were later adopted by two loving people, but she was never the same after that. She was withdrawn and depressed. She was terrified of the world and men. She wouldn’t let anyone get close to her in fear that someone would try and hurt her again.
It’s been 9 years since all of that happened and she’s 16 now but the memories are still there, worse than ever. She lays in bed every night, softly crying silent tears. She wonders when the pain will ever go away? She thinks to herself “What is wrong with me? Why do I feel so alone? Why did it happen to me?” She shakes in fear from the terrible memories that are stuck in her head.
When she finally falls asleep she tosses and turns from the terrifying nightmares she has. She wakes up screaming inside, trying to shove out all the horrible images from her mind. She knows that she’s safe now but she’s still terrified. She doesn’t know who she is. She hurts herself. She thinks that death is her only way out, she needs help but no one knows how to help her. She’s tired and hopeless. She’s broken..
Timothy Mkanalumo:
Gender Based Violence is not a simple issue to joke about. I wrote this in attempt to give you a glimpse of how a girl is shattered both psychologically and physically. Some people overcome this sense of hopelessness and apathy while others like Natasha keep hurting themselves. It is better to stop abusing these little children be it a boy or a girl because what you do today may affect their well being in future.
PLEASE LET US STOP GENDER BASED VIOLENCE