I don’t know why God denied me the chance of getting to know your favourite colour, the chance of getting to see your beautiful smile, and the chance of calling your mother.

I never knew how old I was when you passed away. Reality kicked in at the age of 10, I used to sit outside every night talking to the stars which I thought was you. I cried and begged God to take away all the pain. 

People used to ask me about you and I never knew what to say. I did not even know whether I’m a complete copy of you or not. 

It’s so hard for me to accept that you’re no more. I miss you so much, mother. I sometimes feel like my being here is like betraying you. I’m so tired. So tired of having to wake up every day and act as if I’m okay. I’m so tired of hoping that you’ll come back. I’m so tired of everything. I’m still writing you endless letters while I know that I’ll never get a response but I feel like I can’t breathe without you mamma. 

I know that we’ll be together, soon.