I wondered what my friend meant when she said this to me. We were having one of our casual lunchtime discussions. I was telling her about a situation that I had recently found myself in where two girls from the same family (cousins) both had feelings for me. I had flirted with them on different occasions and had then gotten their numbers. Of course, I didn’t know that they knew each other or even that they were related. And I was pretty convinced at the time that the first one I had flirted with wasn’t interested in me. That’s why I went on to flirt with the second one.

To my surprise, the first girl was very interested in me and so was the second one.

So I was faced with a decision: I had to choose who I would be with between the two of them. No matter how wonderful I thought both of them were, I had to choose only one. I couldn’t have both of them.

And this is where my friend’s advice became useful. Because, as it turns out, she was trying to tell me that the prettiest girl isn’t necessarily the one who will have all the things I’m looking for in a relationship.

But, anyways, back to my story.

The first girl is an everyday kind of girl who fusses a little bit about make-up, fashion and all the other related stuff. But she’s still pretty straightforward. And she knows how to treat me and other people with kindness, affection and respect, knows how to work for her money and how to save it, and knows how to hold a decent conversation.

The second girl, on the other hand, cares in the same way about make-up and fashion, but she just doesn’t seem to have the other qualities that the first girl has. She’s got long nails and braids, but can’t seem to hold a decent conversation, worries about herself a lot and expects me to worry about her in the same way. One thing I can’t deny, though, is that she’s got that face Rihanna had back in 2007. You know that innocent and cute looking face.

To a lot of guys I know the choice would be easy. The second girl would be the perfect choice, because she fits the magazine or movie image that a lot of guys have when they think of a girlfriend.

But I’m different. The truth is that I wanted it to be about more than just that. My friend agreed.

“This is your chance to prove that you can practice what you preach, Sicelo. Choose the one who has all the important things you want in a woman, not the prettiest.”

And that’s what I had to do. I had to look at the two of them and ask myself which one is the kind of girl that I would bring home to meet my mother.

The second girl is afraid to speak her mind around me. She is sweet. I could tell that she’s a kind girl. But it feels like all she wants to do is just look at me, smile and let me do all the talking. I can’t handle that. I want to be able to have meaningful conversations with my girlfriend, not someone who will just sit there and look pretty. The first girl is different. Way different. She is chatty. She isn’t afraid to talk about her feelings for me, flirt, and to tell me about her past experiences. And that’s exactly what I want in a girl I’ll be seriously involved with.

But enough about me, though, let’s talk about what you prefer.

#ChatBack: Do you also believe that the prettiest horse doesn’t always win the race?

Do you also want a boyfriend or girlfriend who is pretty on the inside, and not just the outside?

Let’s take to Facebook: like my page and tell me What’s poppin’ in your kasi.