Let’s talk about the latest TikTok trend taking the internet by storm: stay-at-home girlfriends!

Kendal Kay, a 25-year-old who resides in Puerto Rico, is the perfect example of this trend. She starts her day with a rigorous skincare routine and a healthy green juice before journaling and tidying up her gorgeous home. After hitting the gym, she prepares dinner for her partner.

So, what exactly is a stay-at-home girlfriend? It’s a term that stems from stay-at-home wives or moms, and it’s become a popular trend on TikTok, where influencers share their daily lives. These women usually wake up early to exercise, indulge in an extensive morning skincare routine, make fancy breakfasts, do light chores (while looking fabulous), and run errands like grocery shopping. They also prepare meals for their partner, although this can vary.

The benefits of being a stay-at-home girlfriend are apparent. They don’t have to work a regular job and can lead lavish lives filled with healthy food, exercise, expensive clothes, and lovely homes. But, there are some problematic aspects to this trend.

One major problem is that stay-at-home girlfriends are not financially independent. If the relationship were to end, they could be left with no financial claim to their ex-partner’s assets, leaving them at risk of having no money. Additionally, these women often portray lives of going out with friends regularly, giving the impression that they have an active social life.

However, many of these influencers are not just stay-at-home girlfriends. They are earning money from their social media presence. This can be misleading for women wishing for this lifestyle, as they may think these influencers have no job. That’s not to say that all stay-at-home girlfriends are influencers, but it’s essential to recognize that the reality may not match the image portrayed on social media.

So, while being a stay-at-home girlfriend may seem glamorous, it’s essential to consider the potential risks and realities before jumping in. South African TikTok sensation Zoe proudly labels herself as a stay-at-home girlfriend.

Zoe’s TikTok page is filled with videos of her taking luxurious bubble baths, whipping up scrumptious meals for her partner, and running errands. With over 49,000 followers, Zoe explains that she and her boyfriend have an arrangement where he pays for all the bills and her lifestyle.

While some people have reservations about the stay-at-home girlfriend trend, arguing that it goes against feminism and that women should have a say in the household and career space, others are envious of Zoe’s lifestyle.

Here are some comments from a few of Zoe’s TikTok videos:

“I also want a stay-at-home girlfriend sana 🥺”

“Girl you’re living my dream life🥺”

“The definition of SOFTLIFE 😫”

“Your hair ! ♥️🦋 … Please send me plug for your hair … ☺️”

I talked to three women to get their thoughts on being a stay-at-home girlfriend, and their responses were pretty diverse. Simamkela Zweni, a 21-year-old University of Cape Town student, said she would never want to be a stay-at-home girlfriend. She enjoys being independent and working for her own money, which gives her joy.

Lebogang Matlhanya, a 23-year-old student at the University of Johannesburg, found the idea of being a stay-at-home girlfriend ridiculous. She believes in the importance of being financially independent and not relying on a partner for everything. While she appreciates a caring partner, she would never want a relationship that perpetuates the idea of not making a living for herself.

Amukelani Mabaso, a 22-year-old Assistant Venue Manager, sees being a stay-at-home girlfriend as a difficult thing to navigate. But she is open to the idea as long as she retains her autonomy and is not made to feel less of herself.

Ultimately, it’s up to the woman to decide what works for her. It’s important to remember that influencers may share a life that the average person may never have, and that social media isn’t always what it seems. So, whether you want to be a stay-at-home girlfriend or not, always prioritize your own happiness and autonomy.

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Tell us: What do you think are the perks and pitfalls of being a stay-at-home girlfriend? 

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