There was this one girl in our neighbourhood, Faith. She dated every one of my friends and also slept with every one of them, except for me obviously. So my grandfather was concerned about her because she was a member of our church. Also my grandfather was very close with her grandmother. Now all I knew at the time was that Faith was dating Mzwandile.

My grandfather had seen her with some other guy, so he had a little talk with me about my friends.

“People are often determined by the kind of company they keep with them. I won’t pick friends for you but you must look at yourself and ask yourself if this is who you are and what you stand and believe in.” My grandfather was wise and always had something wise to say and what he told me that day made me think a lot.

All my friends had girlfriends and they knew each other’s girlfriends. Each time one of them would break up with his girlfriend, the girl would date one of my other friends. When that happened my friends would go for days without speaking to each other. So that only meant that they were bad mouthing each other to their girlfriends.

I was completely different from them. I listened to soul music, old deep RnB and that made me a hopeless romantic at heart. I believed that when you are in a relationship with someone you must loyal, honest, trustworthy, loving, caring and understanding. I didn’t like fighting. With Bridget in my life I got the chance to be romantic and sweet and always make my girlfriend happy, just as my grandfather used to make my grandmother happy all the time.

Bridget and I had been dating for a couple of months and had never had a fight. She had a friend that behaved like my friends because she never stayed in a relationship for a long time. She had a different boyfriend all the time. I once asked her how she manages being friends with that girl and she told me she was unique and that she didn’t do things just because her friends or other people do them.

We were so much in love, we were the perfect couple. My friends constantly told me not to trust a girl and that she would hurt me but I didn’t want to believe them and I had no reason to, they saw negativity in girls that’s why they cheated on them. I was never going to be like them.


Tell us what you think: How big an influence can friends be? Should a person be labelled by the company he/she keeps?