I will forever live to regret the day I allowed my heart to fall into sin: the day I fell in love with my sister’s husband. As Jesus said in the Book of John, “He that is without sin among you, let him cast the first stone at her.” I’m already paying for my sins and I don’t need more crucifixion.

As I was saying, I fell in love with the wrong man, or I thought I did. It still confuses the hell out of me as to whether it was love or lust. Either way, it doesn’t take away the fact that I fell into sin with my sister’s husband.

This happened three years ago when I visited my sister’s marital home for the festive holidays. I had to look after her year-old twins during the day when she was at work. Her husband’s work was already closed for the holidays so he was always home with me. We used to spend a lot of time together, to the point that we started getting too comfortable with each other. Sometimes I would find myself drooling over him and reprimand myself. The fact that he was handsome and sexy doesn’t make it right.

We started flirting with each other and throwing hints to each other that we wanted each other. It came to a point where I would get annoyed when my sister came back from work and started being all lovey-dovey with David. I couldn’t stand looking at them smooching. I wanted all that to myself, I wanted my sister’s life.

Things escalated from flirting to a little fling. We would exchange spit privately here and there during my sister’s absence. It didn’t end there. I became his booty call. I reduced myself to a booty call all in the name of having David to myself and indulging myself in him.

Our sinister affair caused a dent in their marriage. It actually threatened their marriage because David was drifting away from Lesego. Instead of feeling guilty, I celebrated my sister’s tears. I never even thought about how much it broke my sister, nor did I think about my nieces. I was too selfish to even consider that.

Lesego eventually found out about it and I faced dire consequences. Look at me now, all alone, jobless, homeless and miserable. My parents disowned me when they found out. I was always the black sheep of the family and my sister was the apple of their eye. Death, do your worst! Besides, me dying will be good riddance to bad rubbish. I’ve done enough damage in this world.
Signing out, Dimakatso Molepo.

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