Being young, sitting in the bathroom and looking at the pregnancy test with two defined red lines can be the worst thing that could possibly happen to a young woman. Finding out you’re carrying a child as a child who has her entire life ahead of her can be the first real heartbreak you’ll ever experience. Finding out you’ll have to choose between you or someone you’ve never met before.

My mom chose me and she will always choose me.

My mom is one who cries once, takes responsibility and does what she needs to do even if she doesn’t want to do it.

I’m not going to sit here and write about all the clichés. “My mom is strong, she’s my hero. She does everything for me. She’s a mom-in-a-million who never does anything wrong.” No, my mom gets tired. She scolds and she makes a lot of mistakes. She thinks too much. She gets angry and irritated. She also asks me to get the remote even though it’s a hand reach away. She’s a coloured mom who sits in her swirlcose and gown, looks outside of the window and says “It’s sunny outside. We should do the laundry” instead of “Let’s go to the beach!”

She’s insane but she’s my mom. She’s mine.

Yes, she’s my mom but I too had to learn how to love her just like she had to learn how to love me. To be the eldest daughter and sibling makes me the second mom to my younger siblings and a reflection of my mom. When she speaks to me she’s talking to the younger version of herself which means we do not always see eye-to-eye.

Although we disagree on so many things, I can say with confidence I am proud to have the wisdom of my mom. She taught me things that you will never be able to learn in a high school life orientation textbook.

My mom is understanding but even she fails at times to be a good parent. Her making mistakes, makes her human and it also makes her the best mom to me because she teaches me that it’s okay to make a mistake now and than as long as you learn from it. She also taught me that you can always break down crying whenever your heart gets hurt but after you’re done, you should never show people you’re weak but rather wipe your tears and get back up again. She taught me that a woman is more stronger than just carrying babies in her hand and lifting up the couches to sweep under them. My mom has taught me to be humble and kind but not a people pleaser or you will get walked over. Each day I learn something new from my mom.

As a woman who found out she’s pregnant at 20, it breaks your heart but as she was carrying me for nine months, I laid under her heart fixing it and that’s when she started loving me.

The day she saw the positive pregnancy test in her hand, was the day she might have thought her life ended but that was the day God gifted me my soulmate, my first love, my mom.