DEAR ME (Past)

Hey. I hope you’re good. I can’t really remember much about you. One of the few things I remember is how happy you are. You have no exact goals for yourself, just things set out for you by our over-protective and strict Mom, and those are to be JUST a child. You have no stress, no problems, no negativity in your life. Well, the only problem is the beatings/punishments you always get for messing up. You sometimes get away with it (I miss that. Lol.) Your life is filled with extreme happiness; excitement; experiences; purpose; passion; energy to achieve, to be better, and just to learn. The one thing I miss about you is how you are you. You don’t care what shoes you have, clothes you wear, house you live in.

You are not ashamed of the people who live in it. You walk the streets like you know what’s expected of you. Everything that society does is not on your agenda: it’s the least of your worries. You are told not to follow other people’s footsteps because you have to create your own. You have freedom. The kind of freedom that I don’t know. Only the dictionary definition. I miss you, and I just wanted to tell you: don’t get influenced by what’s happening outside the house. It’s dangerous for you outside.

I know I sound like your mother right now, but she’s right. Always has been. As for Dad, he hasn’t changed. Talks loudly and too much, but never speaks of how he’s feeling. Well, not really: you’ll see. One thing I ask of you is to speak up about how you feel, it’ll help. A LOT! Strive to do better all the time, and never procrastinate. ALSO learn to love. Love isn’t the worst thing. It hurts but it’s a beautiful feeling to experience.

DEAR ME (Present)

Hey you. I don’t even have to ask how you are because I know how you feel: I mean, it’s me. You miss the younger version of yourself right? You wish you could go back to him and be him: be the you who had no expectations, no long-term goals, no stress, no heartache and misery. Well, change is inevitable and you knew beforehand that you had to grow up. Please don’t disturb him, he’s happy and you could be too if you just extract a few things from what the younger you is doing. Like stopping caring what society says (yes, I know you’re part of the what-will-people-say crew) or what shoes or clothes you wear. You’re just good at masquerading. You suffer from wanting to be the most resilient amongst your friends. Don’t compete with them because life isn’t a competition. Everyone has to do things at their own pace. Also, learn to be more open and honest.

My first question is, why are withholding everything that happened to past you and current you inside you? It’s not healthy and you know it. I can’t seem to understand why you’re not taking any action about everything you have an idea for. You’re the smartest you you could be. Stop underestimating yourself. Stop pressurising yourself. You know you can achieve a lot if you just focus on you and let others be. Take your time. They won’t mind, you chose good friends even though sometimes you feel you’re not meant to be in that crowd. You’re where you’re supposed to be, that’s what you believe: lowkey your friends want the best for you. Family is important too, I know you know that. There are times where you feel like they’re the worst but they’re not. You need to learn to be more verbal about how much you love them. Say it to them. It’ll be good for your soul. Other than that, you’re not a failure, it’s just things aren’t working according to the pace you hoped for. You will get there. Be patient and be happy. Happiness isn’t the amount of money or fancy materials you have. Happiness is a feeling which requires NOTHING. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. Just a good joke, good friends, loving family, a smile. Less overthinking and more accepting things the way they are.

DEAR ME (Future)

Hey. I hope you will be good. Matter of fact, I hope you will be happy. More than happy. I hope you achieve everything the present you is currently struggling for. I hope you know the true definition of freedom. I hope you get married, have a family, and have plenty of kids, because it’s what the present you wishes for. I hope you learn to love, be verbal about feelings, and break through societal norms and expectations. I have nothing much to say about you ‘cause I don’t know you, prolly never will cause “no one knows what the future holds”. I love you but I need you to love yourself more. Love other people too. I wish I could meet me, the future me. I’ll keep me safe for you.

Till we meet. Bye.