Saddening times fall in my fragile heart, hence I’m tossing and turning on Tiro’s grey double bed, taking my mind back to Ma’s words – I should have listened. A 15-year-old me teenager is living in regrets. A day doesn’t end without a punch on my tiny body.
“Ma, I remember your words,” I say as I get out of bed, and drag my heavy feet to see the reflection of myself crestfallen. I stand in pains before the mirror, wearing a wrinkled and torn yellow dress, covered with blood stains and an unpleasant smell of my everyday bruises. Slowly, I try to open my burning eyes. I can’t believe what I’m seeing in the cracked mirror; a depressed young girl with messy hair, bleeding nose, swelled jaws, glassy and black eyes, and she lost weight. “God! Can you take me out of this place?” I pray dismally, and throw myself on the floor. I feel so empty. I feel like I’m carrying the whole world’s tribulation. I’m weeping on the same floor my body moped yesterday.
After a moment, I hear a sound of keys from the door.
“Not today please,” I whisper while shivering. I can hear the sound of his voice mumbling behind the door. It’s half-past-nine pm, the man is intoxicated, and I’m petrified that he’ll turn me into a punching bag, again
He opens and gets inside, “Little slut, I’m back,” then picks and throws me up to the bed, “I’m sorry about yesterday,” and lastly sleeps next to me.
Just like that? Tiro doesn’t care about my feelings. I should have listened to Ma when she warned me about this guy. The front sit of his boss’s taxi deafened me. I remember dodging school every day, just to spend my precious time with this monster. We went to the malls and national parks together, holding each other’s hands like it was our last time on earth, but today, he is betraying me like an alcohol. I should have listened to Ma two-years-back that I’m too young to chase boys. Now I deeply feel the punishment of each tear drop she wept.
In pains, I mourn as Tiro holds me, “Ouch,” a little touch from his hands hurt. My body is in pains.
“Huh-uh!” he closes my mouth with his index finger, and burps alcohol.
Gosh! I wish I can vomit but there’s nothing in my stomach. I can’t do anything. I’m one of his disk that he overplays, and I crack each time he does.
Now he gets on top of me, a whole 119 Kg buries me alive. Thank God, a call from his phone removes him from me, “I have to take this one,” he says then gets out of the bed, “Make sure you eat something, I don’t need excuses from you after the call,” he frowns drastically.
Tiro’s husky voice starts to irritate me. I wonder what got in my mind when I threw myself to this 28-year-old long tom! How am I going to eat? Even drinking a sip of water is a hard thing to do. I just gaze everything with running tears in the fridge, I’m so broken.
“Child, please don’t go, all I want is you to have a better future, Tiro will dump you like a trash after he’s done tossing you around.” Ma’s voice echoes in my head. Tears fall down. I’m sniffing. My heart is beating heavy. A stage fled me from my comfort home. I blame the mind of my adolescence stage.