Lord, I repent these feelings seep from my wrapped gift face. These feelings of hate, resentment and rage. They make me regret gracing my family with my two cents. It’s just that the one-way trip to completion doesn’t reveal these feelings beforehand. Who would’ve known that emotions contrary to my heart entrap? Or that I die in shame whenever I retreat underneath my blankets?

The amusement of darker roots reaching in me is sealed by the four walls surrounding me. Can angelic leaves tell that curses are directed to persons I know to care most for me? Can the blue days know the truth my voice hides in the wake of my frustration? Can the lighthouse guide the light to a secret harbour of ill in me? 

Lord, may you hear me. Hear my frustration with these 50 shades of Grey in me. Send the apologies that I whisper every chance I see the evil come at them. Send reason to the shattered parts of me. Blanket me with serenity and strength. Water me with dedication and loyalty to my purpose. It isn’t to be right it is not to lose sight.