Truth is, I hate how I feel lately.
From the moment happiness became a stranger
Life has always been not worth waking up for.
Sometimes I wonder if is it what I feel or if it’s something happening for real.
I feel, hate, anger, disappointments, betrayal, and sense of not belonging.
If I had a chance to discuss each feeling, the only thing I will repeat is “how I don’t know.”
Sometimes trying to explain to people what you feel, is like pushing them away.
Am scared of being totally honest about how I feel, simply because they won’t understand what I feel.
People claim to understand but gets to repeat the same thing we just complained about.
I feel hatred filling up the empty spaces in my life, every time I close my eyes. I see another reason why I should hate.
I can’t be fighting hatred where else I have been given no love but claimed to be loved.
If one could listen to you speak, I know am a disappointment, perfect example for the whole family. It’s funny that I never got the tag of the sheep, but I still awaits for it.
You don’t want to be wrong, but you want to be listen to.
The universe gave me something to claim for, I gave it commitments. Sleep on “sorry” texts, wakes up on “I have something to tell you” text.
Listen it, you will realize you trusted wrong person. When I gave it commitment. I never thought I will be betrayed by you, universe.
Where do I belong to? When you knock, they mute, when you call, they ignore and when you disappear, they send the search squad.
I hate how I feel today, if feelings had insurances. Mine would be rich as it will be time to claim.
We run to the right people, but we are never given a chance to express how we truly feel, hence everything we touch breaks into pieces of nothing but regrets.
It’s through what I still feel that makes want to quit, leave, and delete everything. If existence was like the one of snow. I will be here now and gone within an hour.
Never mind me, it’s just how I feel. Some of us, the universe has no ears to listen. Am sorry universe maybe I stepped your toe and am being punished for it. Feelings of an unknown civilian, with universe painting failures to the face every day. It’s just how I feel.