You left, and the world didn’t crumble. Before I die, I want to be somebody’s favourite hiding place. The place they can put everything they know they need to survive. Every secret, every solitude, every nervous prayer, and be absolutely certain I will keep it.
As I lay here staring out the window, our memories flowing through my mind, holding back tears as they hit the pillow, scared of thoughts. I might find telling myself I will be stronger tomorrow if you would just come back. Until then. But instead its constant sorrow.
Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it’s better to leave them broken than trying to hurt yourself putting them back together. Healing doesn’t mean the damage never existed. It means the damage no longer controls your life. But there are things I won’t forget. I did everything right for someone that did everything wrong. Temporary happiness isn’t worth long term pain.
Love is the person you think about during the sad songs. But a hurt heart heals. I knew I wasn’t special, but you told me different. And I knew that you would be fine without me, but you said you would be a mess. And I guess time shows people’s true colours. Because it’s been only a short time and I’ve been replaced. And you’re OK. I should have listened to myself, but your voice was like a beautiful melody and I believed every word that left your mouth.
You said that you’d never hurt me. You said that you’d never fall for another. You said that you’d never leave. You said that you’d always be there. But where were you? Where were you when I was sobbing in the dark with my wrists stained red? I was so sure I wouldn’t get hurt. I was so sure. I convinced myself I didn’t care when we stopped talking. I convinced myself it was perfectly OK when you never said hello when you saw me. I convinced myself you were just a small chapter of my life. But I can’t lie. Whenever you smile at me my whole day gets better. I can’t lie. When I hear you laugh I smile to myself. I can’t lie. I’m a fool for you and I’ve always been but it’s coming to an end before my shattered heart gets more shattered.