How many I cried doesn’t matter; the pain has evacuated the heart. I’ve dealt with it, and it’s about time I make peace with myself. But how do I forgive myself? It was one of my biggest wishes, but my well-being took it away from me. Thinking I knew two much took it all away from me; not having a backup person who could enlighten or guide me then was a sorrow…….

Days go by, and I’m the broken one. Years we met and passed, I saw shame. Hours and seconds, Lord showed no mess, I asked myself; comparing to those I attended high school with, I turned out just like those I used to stop and stare at, wondering how they survived. They never answered me back then. Perhaps they could sense I’ll be just like them. I’m feeling what they used to feel cause, yes I’m in their shoes now

Life is a journey, they say. I say life is between learning and teaching; to be safe, I prefer you be a teacher. Go on and never be afraid to teach life. Indeed, by time, it will learn it’s hard and painful to let life lead you cause acceptance is tough, hard and full of blood. Take your steps, fail, learn. The goal is to find closure, no matter the outcome, and “find the ending”.Let the ending reach you; its more saver.

The spirit of the school is behind all of my sadness. I never thought if maybe I could have “thought”, the story could have been different. Time will go back, read it, and my needs will be met.