Suicide is not an option, but it’s all you see. Pain in every word that comes from your mouth slices your heart.

I pray for you day by day, asking for help for your heart. Yet you push yourself further into the pain, so you become numb. Ideas not your own but the devils.

You believe a coffin is the best option, no more nights of fighting. No more tears, no more pain, your mother breaks apart, finding her only child gone.

Breaking down as she puts you 6 feet under. Pain in every word as she utters golden words about how much she loved you. Yet you saw her as a demon, but she loved you with her entire heart.

Poems, plays, and songs about happiness and love they beg you to listen to. Know them the pain you endure as a Christian fighting day by day with a blade to your throat.

Poems I write to help people find comfort and shelter. Yet fire shun upon my work, know your the pain you have inflicted upon my my work that fuels my poetry.

So I cling to the cross, cling to God, hopefully one day to pull through. Pain great by my Lord greater.