New Year’s resolutions stem from our desire for change. Because a new year is a new beginning, it’s a natural time to think about what you want to change in your life. It’s good to acknowledge your need for something new, but when you use an external marker like New Year to try to create internal changes, you may be setting yourself up for failure.

Instead of making resolutions each year, take time out to reflect. Goals are good but don’t try to achieve too many at once. When it comes to change, flexibility and adaptability are key. If you set rigid goals for yourself and aren’t able to adapt when other things come up, you’ll quickly give up on your goals. You need to be practical when implementing change. Do it gradually and you’ll have a far greater chance of success.

Ensure that your goals are your goals, not ones you think you should be making because society demands them. Make sure they’re right for you and have relevant personal applications for your life.



Empowered people stand out in a crowd. They light up from the inside, and their power shines through in their posture, eyes and tone of voice. They’re confident and spontaneous because they’ve chosen their path. They’re ready for every opportunity and can respond 100% to the things they choose to commit to, yet they’re relaxed and flexible too. So, how can you find your inner power?

1. Know yourself

Self-knowledge is number one. Once you’re aware of your strengths and weaknesses, you have a platform on which to develop self-esteem and a sense of your own value.

Ask yourself…

Q. What are my strengths?
Q. What do I love about myself?
Q. What do others compliment me on?
Q. What would I like people to compliment me on?
Q. What makes me feel daring and attractive?
Q. What makes heads turn when I walk into a party?

2. Assert yourself

Assertiveness is not aggression. It’s having the ability to express your needs and feelings directly and honestly without violating the rights of others. Try this:

Be honest and upfront about your feelings, your needs and your opinions. Start expressing your opinions and feelings more often, even if you suspect others may not like them.

State your feelings and opinions directly, without being apologetic or hesitant, but always courteously.

Instead of letting others impose their needs and values on you, tell them what you want and feel.

Get in touch with your physical strength by doing a self-defence course or taking up kick-boxing or fencing.

Say no to unreasonable requests, making sure you use the word ‘no’. If you like, give a frank explanation, but don’t apologise for saying no and don’t make up an excuse.

3. Have a vision

When you’re comfortable with your purpose in life and the direction you’ve chosen, you’ll have the courage to support it continually. And when you see everything as having a place in your big picture, setbacks are less likely to distract you and pull your down. Define your vision. Ask yourself…

Q. What would I like to achieve this year?
Q. What would I like to achieve within five years?
Q. What would I like to achieve within 20 years?

And daydream of success – daily.

4. Think wild thoughts often

There’s a wild, wonderful person inside all of us, and contacting him or her can be an incredibly powerful experience.

Ask yourself, ‘If I could do whatever I wanted right now, without any limitations or boundaries, what would it be?’ Take five minutes to think wild thoughts. Write them down. Would it be heading for the hills with your tent? Dancing on a bar counter tonight? Travelling the world? Changing career? Allow yourself to gratify your wild inner desires, as long as they don’t cause harm to yourself or others.

Finally, don’t ask yourself that question once a year; ask it of yourself often. You’ll get a sense of your inner spirit and drive.

Try this today! Don’t constantly defer your happiness by thinking you’ll be happy when something changes. Happiness is a choice. It can happen right here, right now, no matter what your situation.