It’s Saturday morning and I’m trying to do my weekly clean-up of our little flat – since who knows what Sunday will bring. But Leila is not happy.

“Me wanna go park, Mama. Me wanna go swings,” she whines, tugging at my jeans.

For a moment – just a brief moment – I have an urge to scream at my little girl. But I fight it. I fight the frustration building up in me. Sometimes it feels like everywhere I turn, there are just demands being made on me. In a never-ending cycle. Always what everyone else needs and wants! What I need, what I want, doesn’t even matter.

I take a deep breath to calm myself. I pick Leila up onto my lap. “Sweetheart, you help Mama clean. Then later, guess where we are going?”

“Where?”

“To Auntie Shalani’s house.”

“And Doneekie and Kylie? Yay yay!”

That cheers my little girl up. She uses her doll’s blanket to wipe the chairs. And the table legs. And the bottom part of the door. My heart lurches with love for her – and with guilt for the frustration I had felt.

Meanwhile the dreaded invoice from the day-care is still lying on the kitchen table.

And then my phone rings. Shalani, of course.

I want to tell her I am busy, ask her to phone later. But she is crying, so distressed she can barely speak.

“Oh no, Shalani! What’s wrong? What’s the matter? Can I help?”

It is very seldom that Shalani gets into a state like this. So I’m worried.

“It’s DK,” she manages between sobs.

DK? Has he been cheating?

I wouldn’t be surprised. I’ve always suspected he has affairs on the side. Now that he’s rich and successful, he seems to think he’s God’s gift to womankind, that he’s irresistible. He struts around like he’s the only rooster in the henhouse! What is it with guys like DK? The minute they have big bucks, they automatically assume they’ve turned into Denzel Washington.

“What’s he done, Shalani?”

It takes her a while to get her crying under control and explain. It seems DK has cancelled their trip to the Seychelles next month. Some urgent project has come up at his work.

“Is that all?”

“You don’t understand, Jane. I need a break. The twins really tire me out! But DK doesn’t consider my needs at all …”

And this is the moment when I finally lose control. All the stress and frustration I try so hard to keep a lid on, finally boils over.

“What’s wrong with you, Shalani, whining about some stupid holiday? Don’t you realise what a lucky chick you are? Don’t you know what a bloody easy life DK provides for you? You don’t understand the first thing about real problems and real struggles. You should be grateful, so very grateful for all your blessings, instead of acting like a spoiled brat …”

I carry on like this for several minutes until I run out of words – and anger. I suppose this will be the end of our friendship. I feel sad for little Leila: she loves playing with Dominique and Kyle.

But maybe – maybe – this is for the best? Maybe it’s time this friendship came to an end? It isn’t doing me any good. I am so tired of feeling envious of Shalani. I am tired of being bitter when I compare her life to mine.

***

Tell us what you think: Would Jane be better off without this friendship?