When someone like Tee – who I envy for her ability to making even the unexpected seem normal – is speechless, then you know the ish has hit the fan. Tee, like my mom, sees silver linings in even the most horrible of situations; they are both natural optimistic-wordsmiths.

I wouldn’t be surprised if Tee was caught making fun of her situation whilst stuck in dog poo with her tongue. I envy her nonchalantly optimistic nature.

So when someone of this nature is suddenly in need of the right words to make sense of their current dilemma, you suddenly see that everyone – no matter how strong they portray themselves; no matter how free-spirited their personalities may be – has a tender spot in the bowels of their hearts where hurt and sadness surely do leave unwanted marks.

We just came back from meeting Simphiwe, Tee’s boyfriend, and the meeting went terribly awful. He was late. And when he finally arrived, he gave us a stinking attitude.

When he saw that I had also been invited to the lunch he started screaming profanity after profanity – such a foul mouth, can’t imagine how he eats with it. The boy caused a few heads around the coffee shop to turn away from what they were doing and focus on us, for a brief eternity.

Having finished dishing us a piece of his special plate of vulgar, he stormed out mad as a hatter.

Tee’s said nothing. Throughout this… circus performance, my friend’s face remained hidden.

“Such bad breeding,” an old man with grey hair sitting at a table not far from ours with what looked like his grandson, shared my sentiments.

Tee had stood up, her head hanging shamefully like an over-bearing peach tree, and walked to the car. I settled the bill and found her at the parking lot. I could see that she was embarrassed, and even more, drained.

In my mind I kept looking for things to say to cheer her up but drew a blank.

Throughout our friendship, she had been the one who always made sure to keep our smiles shining. She did it so naturally; just a simple, stupid word and then we’d burst out laughing. And now that the tables were turned and she needed cheering up, I couldn’t rise to the occasion.

We drove home in awkward silence, made even more awkward by Drunken love that was sipping through from the radio. It tore at my heart.

See, I’m a lot of things, you know all my labels and it’s selfish to say them now, but a comforter I have never been. I can do with awkward silences and confrontations but what I have not yet mastered is how to deal with crying people.

So when Tee started crying while staring out the window, I couldn’t exactly just ignore her. So I asked, “Tee, tell me what’s wrong,” and the response she gave, I wasn’t ready for.

Tee is pregnant.

I know! My mind stopped and my eyes bulged too when she told me. Worst of all I almost caused an accident on the N2. I wanted to scream at her about her irresponsibility, but I couldn’t.

We got home and before I could probe her any further she cried again. She threw herself in my arms like a child yearning for love, with eyes red like blood-stained diamonds, and sobbed until she slept.

Now I’m sitting here stuck with her own questions in my mind. What is she going to do? What will she say to her parents? What is she going to do?

I hope when she wakes up she’ll say it was a joke.

Dish it: What do I say to her?

The Diary of Zinzi Zwane