So the sixteenth of December just happened. My nieces went crazy trying to find an outfit to rock on the day. Each year they spend the first few days of December planning what they’ll wear on the day, going out and buying it, and then planning what they’ll do for fun on the day.

It’s crazy.

But there’s one thing that bothers me about their celebrations of that day. They DON’T know what is being celebrated on the day!

Yes, they don’t know that the sixteenth of December is Reconciliation Day. And that on the day we celebrate everything that Tata Nelson Mandela and Archbishop Tutu symbolise. They don’t know that on this day we celebrate UBUNTU.

And if you’ve never heard of the word and are wondering what the hell it means, you’re in luck, because I’ll tell you right now.

Ubuntu is basically about learning to live with people peacefully. It’s about loving those people and being able to forgive them when they do you wrong and ask for your forgiveness. It’s about working together to build a better South Africa.

So now that we all know what ubuntu means, let’s ask ourselves whether ubuntu is even important for our country. In other words, does our country, in 2014, still need to believe in ubuntu?

Let’s really think about it for a second.

When I was in a taxi from Philippi last week, I heard a bunch of much older women say that things were better during Apartheid times. As soon as I heard “things were better during Apartheid” my brain ignored everything else they said. I was too shocked. And the scary thing is that these women aren’t the only South Africans who feel like this.

If you’ve been following the news lately, you will have seen that a survey was conducted where some South Africans were asked whether or not they think Apartheid was a crime against humanity. In other words, they were asked whether Apartheid was really as bad as a lot of people say it was. Depending on how you feel about it, of course, you might be shocked to find that some South Africans out there believe that it wasn’t bad – that it wasn’t a crime against humanity.

Now, if you remember, earlier on I said that as part of ubuntu people who’ve done you wrong need to realise they were wrong before you can forgive them. So how can all those families who were hurt by Apartheid find peace if there are other people out there who think it was never bad?

I mean, think about it.

If you come home crying that you’ve been robbed and that they took your seven thousand rand phone and even beat you up, you’d wan’t everyone who listens to you to respect and sympathise with your pain, right? You’d want everyone to say, “I’m sorry you were robbed”.

You wouldn’t want anyone saying stuff like, “Hayi suka, a seven thousand rand phone is nothing to stress about, man”. And you certainly wouldn’t want anyone denying the fact that it affects the future, because no matter what they say, you’ll be waking up the next day without a phone.

So, do you see what I mean?

Do you see that even if you weren’t the one who caused Apartheid, you still need to respect the pain of those who suffered from it?

Too many questions, right?

Well, that’s the country we live in. We can’t hide from its history. We can’t hide from the fact that Apartheid still affects even the lives of those we call born-frees.

So talk to me, then.

Do you think Apartheid was as bad as a lot of people say it is?

And if you think it was, is celebrating Reconciliation Day enough to make us forgive and forget everything?