I can’t wait for the bell to ring, I want every piece of him. Everyone can see I am glowing.

“We meet after school,” I tell Angeline.

“Finally,” she exclaims.

The bell rings and I see a message on my phone.

Meet me at Sizo’s Spaza.

OK baby.

Be there at 5pm sharp.

Kool.

I go home and even bath, dress well and go out of the house. I walk straight to the Spaza.

I see him dressed nicely in a tee and faded jeans with Timberland shoes. He hugs me and takes me to the park. We sit as we watch the birds and people walking by.

It is getting dark and I am aware that my parents won’t like this. I should go home or I will get in trouble. He sits closely and then his hands are all over my body. He kisses me then he pulls at my panties. I want more. I am enjoying it, not knowing where it would lead. I have never had sex before.

He is kissing my neck as he is lying be down on the grass. I do as I’m instructed, obeying a master. I notice that he already has a condom on. When did this happen? It hits me that it is our first date and we are already having sex. I push him away and pull on my pants again. I am puzzled.

“What is wrong with you? What did you expect?” he says angrily.

“I can’t do this,” I say.

He pulls my hand. “You wanted sex didn’t you?” he asks, whispering.

All I wanted was him to love me, not sex. This boy, my crush has turned to be something else. He is only after sex after all.

“Let me have sex with you but know that I don’t love you,” he says, pulling me close.

I manage to push him away and run far. This boy wants me to lose my virginity for nothing. I am such a fool. I want to fall in love, the man has to love me. It’s not all about sex, is it? My letter sent the wrong message to him.

Now I have to face him in class every day. What if Prosper finds out? I think as I walk home.

I hate boys, they are just after one thing. Let me prepare my future with education not boys anymore, I decide as I open our gate.

***

Tell what you think: Do you remember your first crush? What were they like?