I miss you a lot. I really wanna text you but I can’t, reason being I don’t know how you will react towards me. Last time I thought I texted you I was in trouble, I’m even afraid to ask this other person about you.

I keep on telling Kebarh about you but trust me she’s not interested. I really cannot help all the feelings I have. I miss your voice and how it used to give me goose bumps. I’m sure you know because I can be obvious at times. Kebarh once told me something about you and it made me more scared to text you.

Oh, gosh! I’m angry at you for some reason. Why don’t you text me? I know you also want to and maybe you’re also scared. I fell in love with your voice and personality. I really wish you could sing for me now. I miss our duet when we sing Nobody Greater than God and Sefapanong ke Bohang. Especially our Brown Skin Girl where we would keep quiet the whole song until that line, “Tonight I might fall in love depending on how you hold me.”

I miss all the memories we had and I will forever cherish them. I remember when you gave Kebarh and me gifts, and sang for me on my birthday. Being far from you for this long time kills me really. I would actually listen to my friends make fun of you and act like I was not hurt but then deep down my heart was hurting. I’m interested in the nerdy side of you. You are not perfect but your imperfections kind of turn me on.

Getting to know you was the best thing ever. I wish we could still be together and have the relationship that we had before. I agree you not the only one on my mind but trust me when I say right now I can’t even sleep because when I close my eyes I see you. This makes me scared; I get butterflies when I call your name.

I love it when Kebarh gives these crazy ideas about us and then pretend like I don’t. Frans knew about our little secret but he acted like he didn’t. Speaking about him just makes me cry. He didn’t approve of our friendship because of our age difference but because you made me happy he let it be. He was not the only one who did not approve of it, even the squad did not but my happiness came first.
When I listen to Dr Tumi’s music, I miss you even more and I remember that you promised to take me to his concert in 2019. You told Kebarh that you were taking out your ‘girlfriend’. Trust me I was happy with you, it broke my heart that our last meet up was at Frans’ funeral. You made me laugh all day long and those feelings came back. We took our last pictures there but you were not even bothered to take your phone and use the pictures as an excuse to talk to me. It’s like you were hiding something. I did not choose to like you the way I do.
I mean you have lots of excuses you could use to text me and I also do, but my pride won’t let me do such things. I’m telling Kebarh about you and all she can say is we’re depressing her. Please text me so that I can get back on track because now the things I do because of you are really embarrassing. I’m even scared of what I’ve become really. I even lost concentration and focus because of you and I really cannot believe that you have that much of an impact on me. My heart skips a beat for you

Your love
Vanessa

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