My eyes were bloodshot red from all the crying. It has been a full 2 weeks but I still feel my heart breaking all over again every time I think about Justin, the man I thought I’ll marry someday. I mean for goodness sake I was engaged to that.. arg I can’t even name call him even though he has hurt me to the core.

I wipe the fallen tear of my face angrily, I feel so stupid for even crying. I still wonder how my body still has the energy to produce more tears.

I tried to forget about what I saw; I thought it was all a mistake or maybe I was dreaming rather having a nightmare.

When I received that text to come to the church I never thought much of it until of course I saw all the beautiful decorated place. I then walked inside only to find him exchanging vows with another woman.

I wished for earth to open up and swallow me whole but it didn’t, the ground did not tremble the earth did not crack open. I just stood there not knowing whether to run away or not. The wedding came to a stand still while I was standing at the open doors of the church. He looked handsome in his blue tuxedo – so beautiful that I should have been the one standing opposite him.

I don’t even remember walking down the aisle or even taking the engagement ring off my finger and handing it over to him.

I did not cause a scene, I did not scream at him and call him a shameless bustard no I walked out of the church half hoping that he will run after me and try to offer me some kind of explanation at least I deserved that now didn’t I?

I was still in our apartment, somehow feeling silly for even being in this apartment and I even felt more silly for not noticing anything. How can one be a fool for 5 years? Or maybe I was the stupidest person on the entire universe.

I look at the boxes ready for me to pack all of my belongings and get out of here not even caring what he did with this apartment.

I close my eyes and swore that never again will I ever look twice in another mans direction, ever! Or so I hoped.