Wanga my Wanzzi
I had not slept there and haven’t met other tenants, my roommate had not arrived and I had a choice to change a room to a single room. I probarbly went shopping that day and made something to eat then went to premier pub. I wanted to see all places to familiarise myself with the city. At the pub two tomboys were playing by the pool table they were dark drinking castle lager or castle lite I can’t quite remember but I wanted a beer to calm my body from the previous night’s club. I bought a can of castle lite and drank watching the game. The TV was also on Rugby or Soccer playing and background music playing. I don’t know how I caught Wanga’s attention but it does sound gay she is dark with soft skin, had draidlocks cutted sides, she wears like a guy, behaves like a guy, the only thing that can set my gay soul free is her soft skin.
“Hi, nice game” I said sipping on my beer.
“You wanna play?” She asked.
“No, I don’t feel like playing” I was embarrassed to tell her I can’t play pool table. I undermined it and was curious because I wanted to play. I thought it was sexy how she played on that table. Damm the girls I’d charm with that I was also becoming gay when Wanga plays.
I went beside her, ” I am Vuo from Vuyolwethu, I am from joburg.”
“I am Wanga and that’s Soso” she said pointing to the other butch. “We met while studying in Idutywa but we are also cousin’s. I am from Ngqeleni in Mthatha but we live around here”
“Cool, I am alone so I guess I’ll just hang here with ya’ll” I said taking a sit watching the game.
They had money, we started buying beers and filled the table and drank. She rolled weed like a professional cigarette factory manager and I used to act like I know everything she does before she does it. Like the pool table, rolling weed, knowing the CBD then tell her I don’t feel like doing it but I know it.
I guess I am bossy, that is it about relationships isn’t it? It’s either you become submissive or feminine or become the masculine one and well I was like a very tall girlfriend with a short girlfriend. We were the same height though and I happen to be masculine because I am kinda chubbish, with hard skin and she’s like a Cute-Bunny-Rabbit “My Wanzzi”.
We went to my res, then spent the night together cuddling and her telling me more about her, she had a body to die for, her hips beneath those Calvin Klein pants and soft bunny body were too hard to resist, she was a femme dressed as man, Her and Soso could just be partners if she didn’t talk that ghetto slang-ish language and be decent like a woman She opened her public Facebook account and showed me her daughter,she told me she had her at her junior years in Mida at Idutywa and fought with a teacher when she came out and changed school, her daughter was all grown and she showed me her c-section scar. I always felt like I had scretch-marks and my c-section scar showed but if she didn’t tell me I’d assume she might have had an appendix mark which was faint. Maybe she felt herself unworthy at age 30 after coming out in junior years (14) that’s why she felt the need to tell me so early. She was spotless not a single bum stretch mark.
Alot can bring insecurities to women or were they made for that (the teenage pregnancies). To reach a certain level on relationship game of having a baby then unlocking being a lesbian chest prize, hooray!!!
“How I got a child” to make me a proper lesbian, getting out of first graduation, doing my practical internships, they were so hard to find, studying was easy, I guess the admin never liked me, I didn’t know where we go after studies, was I to look for myself, was that the only way my womb openned up to a man, to conceive, you have a certificate now and can only be able to conceive by a man on practicals? Unlocking pride, saying bye to my figure confidence, then bit by bit all my friends had kids. Vusiwe had confidence even then, slim, athletic built and had a sexy figure what was I worried about? But everything happened.
My thought :- “Zandile Mngomezulu a senior graduate was a technician on my practical she was from Tanga and remember my neighborhood had never in 20 years had a project even in media since I was a Media graduate. I was expecting to travel South Africa broadcasting in interesting places that I was to learn about not that I am the one who has money to make a movie for my people. The day I met Uza in person was mid-year or close to the end of my practicals when a miracle of conceaving occured. He was on my WhatsApp and we chatted for years from then then I finally met him one night in the busy streets of Butterworth. I went back to ask Zandile who had two kids and was from Tanga, Butterworth not far from my village, Uza’s home village origins. “Do you know THE H IN TANDO guys from Tanga?” I asked. She said, “yes, the other one is a rugby player who was getting married that year in November, the other us like her a Media studies graduate”. She said so many nice things about him, my heavens doors openned up. They got married, I was invited to the wedding, I saw the tent, everything was just fine about those people. I trusted Zandile that she would tell me what is happening in the industry, why she has two kids and not married. She would give hints we went to the same high school I trusted her. She said it was fine, 18 million project to say it is fine. “
While I thought about a child and a baby daddy. I killed Uza’s father and brother Kwanda who actually got married that year I got pregnant. I threw their bodies in the dungeon to be eaten by wild animals they only found traces of their bones.
Should she had not told me I would have never known. So I kept quiet assuming she probarbly doesn’t see my stretch marks and c-section scar too. I could have said destiney brought us together but I kept quiet. Me having a son after my graduation felt like no easy way to explain myself. The who’s the baby daddy atleast at that age I was suppose to have IVF and pregnancy carrier. I kept silent in shame of being an adult and far from coming out of Queer closet.
I listened and continued as Vuyo not Violet and I didn’t correct my “I am from joburg”. I wanted to trust her she was so close to my town everything she said I knew and I was going to give her a heartattack the day I tell her. I didn’t even think of it I thought for myself to fall in love and being happy not about her, I needed peace in this world. I hardly knew most people in my hometown so I also didn’t know Idutywa so I thought it was as far as that to me anyway it doesn’t matter where I am from. I would nod my head even if she says something I might know.
She left the following morning and came over every evenning from that day.
I met a friend I think via Emihle’s group named Tando, tashteedoo she was studying musical instruments at Boston College and she was a musician. She had a round face, long draidlocks, and was a light skinned tomboy raised with her beautiful sisters who were related/dated Anga the Naakmusik musician, were rich and popular. Her home was just welcoming and huge she was raised like a baby. We were very similar with Tashteedo except that she didn’t have a child, just like Soso and we were just human., I found no reason to tell her too. During the day we’d hangout since she was also studying partime then her mother would pick her up from my residence with a big car, a child she was being picked up instead of driving herself such a baby.
My roommate arrived while I was with Tando one evenning talking at the backdoor stoep. Her name was Sheril, she was beautiful light skinned and with an amazing body. She dressed well, also spoiled “a daddy’s little baby girl” child from Mthatha, I introduced her to Tando and she said she was doing her second year in journalism. She had a boyfriend on another res and never slept on her room, I had a single room all to myself with an empty bed the whole year.
Then studies began.
One of our house mates who was studying their second year in IT in another campus of the university introduced me to Anno a Tomboy soccer player in her class who stayed in the residence next to ours with her girlfriend. She just found it suitable for me to be her friend, all girls who see tomboys just want to group them together, “oh my gosh, you and my classmate could make the best of friends”. They had a single room and were both playing soccer. I became fond of soccer and was grateful to have friends at the same varsity even though it was different courses. During the day I’d hang out with Tando, late it was soccer training then class if they are scheduled or wait for Wanga to come back from work. How similar Anno were she had a son in her juniors years too and was from King William’s town, masculine, athletic body and physics she dribbling a soccer ball like a man, I once played soccer at junior school but the teachers stopped the ladies team because of reasons I never paid attention to. So when she asked me if I can play soccer I said I wasn’t busy and would love to join the team. A ballroom dancer who is a ball player that was just perfect, it’s nothing really just dedication and hardwork.
I later on went job hunting and continued playing soccer for the University team.
” Welcome to a world where we have kids, we are single parents. We don’t really know how we got here but let’s fight for here”