In 2021, a good friend of mine from Lilongwe sent me a small parcel, it was a hard drive.

My friend informed me that he had arranged for a certain girl to deliver the parcel to me in Blantyre, the bustling commercial city. He shared her contact, and we planned to coordinate the handover. It all seemed straightforward. Towards the end of our conversation, my friend amusingly remarked about how strikingly beautiful the girl was, saying, “Ndakupopa kwambiri kape iwe, udyetu!.” We both chuckled, and I brushed it off as a playful comment.

Soon, I received a text from the girl on WhatsApp. Her profile picture revealed her undeniable beauty. However, I was in a healthy relationship with a very beautiful and loving girlfriend at the time, so I kept our communication strictly professional.

But the next day, when I shared a post about the character Ghost from the Power TV Show on my WhatsApp status, she responded, igniting a conversation that lasted until midnight. As we bid each other goodnight, she suggested that we continue discussing the show another time, and we agreed.

Fast forward to a weekend, a Saturday. We decided to meet in Blantyre. I was in Kampala, just 10 minutes away from Blantyre Central Business Area. I planned to leave once she notified me of her arrival.

To my surprise, she called to ask where I was while she was already in Blantyre, whereas I was sitting at home, awaiting her call. I hurried to the bus stop, caught a bus, and reached Blantyre in under 15 minutes. I called her to arrange our meeting point. I initially thought we’d meet at a familiar spot like Nandos, a common choice for budget-conscious individuals like me.

But to my amazement, she suggested a luxurious and expensive venue I had never been to before. I’d heard it was known for its high prices, particularly for food and drinks. Curious about the place, I decided to go. Upon arrival, as I attempted to contact her for her exact location, I heard a cheerful voice from behind, exclaiming, “Ghost!! Come here, you’re already late!” I turned to find her seated at a table with some stylish two ladies. Despite my initial discomfort talking to unfamiliar women, she welcomed me with a warm smile, addressing me as “Ghost” in reference to our previous conversation about the Power TV Show.

We engaged in conversation, and she and her friends ordered extravagant dishes. Being financially strained, I settled for a plate of chips and a coke. As I observed the girls placing their orders, I was astonished by the exotic names of the dishes and drinks, many of which were unfamiliar to me.

In my mind, I assumed everyone would cover their own expenses, so I felt at ease. We had a delightful time discussing TV shows, and I abandoned my earlier intention of leaving early.

When it was time to settle the bill, the girl discreetly placed it in front of me. I checked it and was stunned by the total amount, which included the extravagant orders of all four of us. Although the girls had spent significantly more due to their extensive menu choices, discomfort washed over me. To my dismay, the girl quipped, “Ghost, since you won the arguments, you’ll take care of the bill.” I felt an overwhelming sense of dread, contemplating how to manage the bill. I wished I could disappear.

To avoid embarrassment, I reluctantly used the money my Mesho Trevor and I had set aside for rent, utilities, and groceries. I ended up paying every last bit of it, leaving me with only 1,200 Malawian kwacha in my Airtel Money account.

We left the venue, but my mind was preoccupied with thoughts of how to recover the funds. I knew Trevor would inquire about the money, obviously he expected some good relish apart from Soya pieces that once got him sick.

As we parted ways to our respective homes, the girl gave me a hug and suggested we meet at the same place the following weekend. I couldn’t help but wonder if she was genuinely thought I was all good.

Heading back to Kampala, my thoughts consumed me, and I narrowly avoided being hit by a car due to my distraction. On the journey, I couldn’t shake the imaginary voice of soccer commentator Innocent Chitimbe, remarking on my situation, “Mnyamatayo! Amusosola, Bulu wamung’amba nthiti wasala wa umphawi, akuziguguda pa chifuwa kuti ndalakwila ndani kuti ma slay queen andimete mpala opanda madzi Dzuwa likuswa mtengo”

That incident led to a challenging month, and I did my best to avoid Trevor’s questions about our diminishing funds. Thanks to my girlfriend, Shyreen Kalinde, and Francis Nthala, who occasionally sent me some 2K’s, I managed to get by.

This experience is why I tend to decline invitations to meet new people, especially girls, at upscale venues. It’s not out of stinginess but rather due to financial constraints. I hope it’s understood that being broke and being stingy are not the same; some of us are just facing financial difficulties, not unwillingness to spend.