Tar Tulz received a WhatsApp text from Ura inviting him and tar Bora to his place after work.
Ura : Exe njayam_.Hey bro.
Tar Tulz : Z’thini gaz’lam_.What’s up bro?
Ura : Hayi yonkinto imnandi njayam_.everything is good dawg
Tar Tulz : That’s great njayam.Hexe awsatsho ngok ba unesister fondin_.Now you don’t tell us that you have a sister.
Ura : Yilewei bendizak’xelela ngayo nje leyo bra kona bosowuyive ngabani lowei_.This is what I was going to tell you about bra but who told you about it?
Tar Tulz : Okay ke simbona nini_.When are gonna see her?
Ura : How about later today when you guys get back from work?
Tar Tulz : Akho smoko bra sak’bona late_.No problem bro we’ll see you later.
Ura : Sure bra
Tar Tulz : Mojo_.Cool.
Tar Tulz to Tar Bora
TarTulz : It turns out I have another cousin.
Tar Bora : Huh?
Tar Tulz : Yep.Ura’s half-sister.
Tar Bora : So you guys didn’t know about her?
Tar Tulz : Nop.In fact no one knew about her.Not even my uncle.
Tar Bora : Huh? (laughing) grand grand how many children does your uncle have?
Tar Tulz : It’s Ura,the one she’s telling me about which I haven’t met and the twins.Four children.
Tar Bora : Soon another one will appear out of nowhere looking for daddy.
Tar Tulz : Who knows.He’s inviting us to his place after work.
Tar Bora : No problem.
As promised tar Bora and Tulz went to Ura’s place and found him chilling with his sister and two of his neighbors outside.
Tar Tulz : Hexe Ura mfethu.Ninjani ladies_.How are you doing ladies?
The ladies : We good.
Tar Bora : Xe bro
Ura : Ola njayam…Do you guys want to go inside or it’s okay outside?
Tar Tulz : No we’re okay here outside.
Tar Bora : It’s okay mfethu sigrand apha_.We’re okay here.
Ura : Sure braz.Okay bafethu this is uLisa neh,she’s my sister.The one I was telling you about over the phone.
Tar Tulz : Yeah you told me but you didn’t tell me she was a slay queen.
Lisa : I mean hello.(waving her weave)
Ura : You just saw it yourself.Lisa meet Thulani,my cousin and tar Bora,they are married ke as uba uzibona irings_as you can see the rings.
Lisa : Nice to meet you guys.
Tar Bora and Tulz : Nice to meet you too Lisa.
They continued chilling until it was late and went back home.
Tar Tulz : Haven’t that guy contacted you today?
Tar Bora : No.
Tar Tulz : I wonder what is he up to.
Tar Bora : As long as he’s still out there no one is safe .
Tar Tulz : When last did you check up on Madlamini?
Tar Bora : How about we go see her tomorrow?
Tar Tulz : Perfect.
Tar Bora : What do you feel like tonight..?
Tar Tulz : Anything Babe.
Tar Bora : Okay cool.You’re not even helping me.What’s up bra?
Tar Tulz : Maybe after I got a shower.For now you’re on your own.
The next morning tar Bora and Tulz stopped by Madlamini’s house for breakfast.
Madlamini : Haibo bantwana bam ngenani_. Please my children get inside.Khanitshoni ke ndanenzani_.Tell me what did I do to you?
Tar Bora : Ngantoni Oledi_.About what Madlamini?
Madlamini : One would swear ndanigxotha kwam._.I told you never set your foot here again.
Tar Tulz : Sispani Oledi_.It’s work Madlamini.
Madlamini : I’m just happy you guys finally came today.Ever since this one moved out I’ve been lonely in this house.
Tar Bora : Where’s Lindokuhle?
Madlamini : I don’t know maybe she slept out because she’s not in her room.Bonga mntanam please talk to Sisanda I miss the child.
Tar Bora : Okay oledi I will talk to her.Oledi we have to go now we will see you maybe tomorrow or this evening…I’m not sure.
Madlamini : Okay ke bantwana bam ndivuyela ukunibona_.I’m happy to see you my children.Have a good day.
Tar Tulz : Bye oledi.
Madlamini : Bye-bye mntanam
Tar Bora decided to give Sisanda a call
Tar Bora : Sisanda
Sisanda : Ufuna ntoni Bonga_.What do you want?
Tar Bora : Okay let me get to the poin…
Sisanda : If you don’t tell me what you want I’m hanging up
Tar Bora : Can you please hear me out and stop with the drama for once.
Sisanda : So you called just to insult me?
Tar Bora : No of course not.Can you please bring the child over this weekend?
Sisanda : Okay it’s fine.You will see him on Friday.
Tar Bora : Thanks.(dropping the call)
Ura and his sister paid tar Bora and Tulz a visit.
Tar Bora : Exe achuz nawe sisteri.
Ura : Eita bra.
Lisa : Hello.
Ura : We just checking up on you guys.Where’s Tulz?
Tar Bora : He can walk in here any minute.Something to drink?
Lisa : Water please.
Ura : You know my favorite.
Tar Bora : Here’s your beer bra.I’m sorry sisi we don’t have water.We only have juice.
Ura : (laughing) Forget about water bra just give her a beer or a glass of juice,I see she’s still shy.
Lisa : (giggling) Hai Voetzek wena yintoni inxaki yakho_.What’s your problem and wena what do you mean you don’t have water in this house
Tar Bora : I was joking.Here’s your juice.
Lisa : Don’t you have a wine?
Tar Bora : No we only have beer.
Lisa : Okay fine,I’ll take the juice.
Tar Tulz : Eita.Eita.
Ura : Sure mfethu
Tar Tulz : Lisa?
Lisa : Hey mtase
Tar Tulz : Hey my love (giving him a hug)
Tar Bora : I missed you (following him to the bedroom)
Tar Tulz : I hope you didn’t miss me too much.
Tar Bora : You know I can’t help it.Well uhm…as you can see I haven’t started with cooking.
Tar Tulz : How about we all go out…maybe to a Tshisanyama or …I don’t know.You guys can decide.
Tar Bora : Lemme ask them first.Thulani thinks we should go to the Tahisanyama,what do you guys think?
Ura : Fine by me.
Tar Bora : Okay let’s get into the car then.
In the Car
Lisa : Okay guys I’ve been meaning to ask neh..?
Tar Bora : Khululeka sisi_.Relax my sisteri.
Lisa : Please call me Lisa not sisteri like I am some old women.
Tar Bora : I’m sorry.
Tar Tulz : I want to hear this question.
Lisa : Okay mtase like the other day neh when Unathi introduced us he…
Ura : Ura.Say Ura not my full name please.
Tar Tulz : What’s up with you two..
Lisa : Mxn wena.Okay when Ura introduced us the other day he said you guys are married.
Ura : Correct!
Tar Bora : Yes we are.
Lisa : You guys stay together,right? Oh so you guys are friends? What about your wives?
Tar Bora : Wives?
Lisa : I mean are they in the Eastern Cape maybe visit you guys from time to time or…?
Tar Tulz : No,Lisa.
Lisa : Then how does it work..I mean look at you guys,you’re still young and..
Tar Tulz : Young?
Lisa : Yes I’m sure you know what I mean..So Where are they?
Tar Bora : Who?
Lisa : Where’s your wife?
Ura : Aren’t you tired of asking questions?
Lisa : Shut up! I’m not talking to you.
Tar Bora : I don’t have a wife.
Lisa : What? What do you mean?
Tar Bora : I don’t need a wife.
Tar Tulz : We are married,Lisa.
Lisa : What? But how?
Ura : Have you ever heard of the word Gay,Lisa?
Lisa : Oh so you guys are..? you know..
Tar Tulz : Yes Lisa.
Lisa : Wow! Okay now I see.You guys are a perfect match though.
Tar Bora : Thanks.
Lisa : (referring to Ura) Are you also Gay or…?
Ura : No I’m straight.
Lisa : mhm okay
Ura : I’m serious.
Lisa : Okay I believe you.
Ura : I’m starting to thing you’re slow wena Lisa
Lisa : Mna slow haibo kanjani ngoku_.Me slow how?
Ura : Ungayiyeka iawthi ikuthathele iOw ukhona but still uthule because you know nothing about these things_.You’d let a guy take your boyfriend and still keep quiet because you know nothing about people’s sexualities.
Tar Tulz : Why are you saying that?
Ura : Firstly I told her you guys are married and I even showed her your rings,Secondly when you got home hugging tar Bora,she was also there…I mean anyone would have noticed something but here she is asking you all these questions.
Lisa : You don’t like me wena shame.Maybe I should just go back to Gugulethu.
Ura : Now you’re being dramatic.How would I explain that to your father.
Lisa : You know ever since I came here I’ve never heard you referring to him as your father.
Ura : Because I refer to him as itaima.Ndingumjita wase Kasi kalok _.I’m a Township boy.
Tar Tulz : Mxn you guys are crazy yaz (laughing at their conversation).