I was faced with my pen and paper…no, scratch that. I’ve always been good with introductions, but not today. I don’t know whether it’s because I seem to be less emotional today, unlike other times when my tears fuel my pen, or because I’m still uncertain as to why I am writing this. It may be both. I’m in a state of mind where I’m just content with everything, and my mind is free from all these thoughts that keep lingering on longer than they should sometimes. It’s been a while since my eyes produced these salty tears that trickled down my cheeks, wetting my pillow every single time I penned something down.

For the first time in a while, I am writing from my heart and not from my head. Although the battle between those two is ongoing, my heart is winning more lately. My head is more irrational and indecisive while my heart keeps reminding me to keep going and assures me whatever choice I make is best for me. I’m starting to get the hang of using my heart more, especially when it’s not bleeding and longing for something that it will never have, something that didn’t even belong to it in the first place. I wish my head shared the same sentiments, but it believes the opposite. I don’t even know why I wrote this, but I’m glad I still have a connection with my pen that was created by my head amid all the chaos and confusion that was going on in my life. I’m glad that even in good times, I can have a one-sided conversation with my paper using ink instead of teardrops.

This is what I call serenity.