I am in love with a homeless.

We live in a world full of humans that has no humanity.

You get those that gives love

The ones that take love.

Those that receives love.

I on the other hand just observes.

My name is Pet Loang and I have done a number of things wrong in the past. Some messed me up and some just formed apart of my life.

I am not on the receiving, taking nor on the giving part of the love side, more like longing, begging and withholding side.

My story can go both sides, it is up to the universe to decide and make it a happy ending regardless of the actions taken.

I am unhappy although I get to laugh or smile throughout the day but at night when I am all alone, I realize the emptiness. The empty spot in my intimacy life.

Joey and I have been together since I started working for this firm but I feel nothing when I am with him. He does not even give me that reassurance I yarn for. His ignorance just gets the better of him with each given day he gets.

I remember the day perfectly it was a cold and clouds made their appearance tagging along with them rain and thunder. Him and I went to grab a Wacky Wednesday- a bite for two. Joey was his usual arrogant self.

“OH my God! His smell is so disgusting, why would he want to sit at an open space like this!” Joey said covering his nose. Me and Joey was approaching my apartment when we encounter with a homeless man that was sitting on the stairs trying to keep himself warm against the wall to block of the rainy cold wind. After Joey said those words in disgust, the homeless moved to get up and I offered him a hand.

“Pet are you being forreal right now? Don’t touch him! He carries diseases around as if he owns it!”

My attention was fixed and my gaze was on the homeless man. My eyes locked into his eyes and they brought some sort of peace over me. The ocean blue colour caught my attention, they were filled with kindness and hopefulness, I couldn’t look away.

“Pet! Why are you even standing there looking at him?” Joey ripped me back to earth. I didn’t even notice that he was already entering into the building. “Go get the hell out of here!” Joey screamed at the man and that irritated me a little because he was disturbing my peace, again.

“Thank you.” A soft voice spoke to me. I looked at him as he passed me and he apologized looking at Joey and walked off.

“Sorry ain’t good enough you hobo! Now I have disinfect everything!” Joey went off.

Uncalled for I thought to myself as this man was not even near anything that belongs to Joey. “Pet! Come on it’s freezing outside and before you touch anything go use plenty of soap and disinfection to your hands. You not even touching me with those hands!”

The homeless man forgot something, a backpack. I took it in before Joey sees and put in on the chair near the lounge.

In that cold night when the rain approached the earths soil and Joey long gone, my thoughts raced to those ocean blue eyes the kindness it carried and brought onto me gave me a new set of peace and calmness to this lonely feeling I had for a while.

Where could he be in this harsh weather. I got up and stared out of my apartment window with hopes of seeing him on the stairs again but all in vein. Nothing, no one. My eyes seek thoughtful the streets but all I see is objects, no soul. Should I perhaps go and look for him. Just to see him one more time, one last time.

I decide against it and my thoughts on him brought a peaceful sleep onto me.

The next morning when Joey came over for breakfast. We were seated at the table having a bite when there was a knock on the door. Joey went to open the door and one of our neighbours was standing outside.

“Morning sir, this bum is looking for you all over the place, deal with IT!” Greg our neighbour said and walked off. Joey already had his fist out but I stepped in and before I could speak Joey pushed him and closed the door. The man knocked again, I opened and finally he could get a word in.

“I, I am sorry to bother but I was looking for something and was wondering if you maybe-“

“You looking for the trash can!?” Joey interrupted rudely.

“Your backpack.” I said the words after him.

“OH my God Pet!” Joey said and grabbed his coat passing us. Looking me and the man at the door. “Disgusting!”

“Thank you so much, these are of important to me.” The man said again in a low voice.

Those eyes…

They are hiding some kind of mystery.

But again Joey joined in laughing behind the man.

“What could a tramp like you possibly have that is of importance, more stinky shit!?”

“It is my food supplies.” The man answered in Joey’s direction. He turned and walked off leaving Joey staring in disgrace.

I passed him and ran after the man. I hand him some food.

“Not to feel sorry for you but to share a bite with you.” I said smiling not to make him feel some type of way.

“It’s been a long time since anyone has been this kind to me.” He said and looked sincerely.

Why don’t I want him to leave?

Why do I want him around longer?

What is happening to me.

“It is the least I can do for now…”

“Again sorry for the inconvenience. Thank you.”

No wait don’t go, I said not. He walked off and I still stared. I notice that he has a slick move and this was once a respectful man

I wanted to see him again.

I did not expect it to be so soon.

 

Two full moon nights later and I saw him at my door waiting.

“Oh gosh you gave me a fright!” I said when I came around the corner.

“ Sorry ma’am I did not mean to.” He said getting up. How long has he been waiting.

“ What are you doing here?” That may have came out wrong so I smiled a little to not scare him off.

“You helped me a lot and I just wanted to thank you.”

“There is no need to.”

“Wait, I mean- I mean I’m here to help you.”

“How?” I asked confused.

“I was scavenging for food at a parking area when I encountered with your beloved being with a other woman and not to jump to conclusions I stood around and then I overheard them talking about you. He stated that he does not love you nor wants to be with you but that you could beneficial to some project and afterwards he would dumb you on the side. After that they shared a deep intimate kiss and walked off.

I paused for a second to take it all in.

“And could that be of any help to me. How?”

“I wanted to save you from a lot of hurt. I’ve been there..” He said the last part almost to himself and I noticed the hurt in his eyes and voice.

“Can I take you out for dinner and a warm cup of coffee?” I asked instead.

He looked down on himself. “Not to mean disrespect ma’am but did you notice that I am not the material to be taken to open spots hence of my appearance and people would look at me in total disgust.”

I looked at him. “Want to take a shower inside and whilst you do so I could dry clean your clothing.” I said with a smile and I could see how he longed for those words all along because it is like music to ears and he smiles closed eyes saying yes to my offer.

After he gladly accepted, I gave him all the necessities and did his laundry whilst making us a bite.

When he came out of the shower with the towel rapped around his waist. I noticed that it was not only his eyes that are attractive. I noticed his masculine build body. I handed him my robe and although it was no where near his size, he gladly accepted. His face is well structured and he was more handsome without his Santa beard. Now I could see his perfectly aligned teeth better complimented by a soft and smooth smile. I almost gasp out loud as I find his lips very appealing.

As we enjoyed dinner, I finally had the heart to speak. “You were the first man to help me unselfishly. I know Joey was never honest with me but I never wanted to be alone. I have been feeling that way since forever.”

“You do not have to endure all of that abuse from him ma’am-“

“Pet, please call me Pet. You?”

“My name is Curt ma-, Pet.”

“So what is your story Curt. I did not look in your bag but it was far to empty to have been used for food storage.”

We moved to the lounge as I spoke.

“My identity is in there ma’am and that is the only personal belonging I have besides the bag. I am human and I have made mistakes and one of them was choosing to marry in the wrong family. My wife and her family betrayed and sabotaged me and that ruined my life. Until today I struggle and lost myself but my dignity was still intact and I still have hope, until one day God sent me an angel to rescue me out of the dark. I wanted to lose hope ma’am but then you gave me a set of light in the right direction….”

Those eyes…

There is that sparkle that caught my attention .

 

I leaned forward and kissed him…