Growing up, I learned that family isn’t just about the people you’re born into. It’s about connection, love, and who shows up for you when life gets tough. For me, family is complicated. My world consists of my parents and sister, they are my blood family. But the rest? Nope. Not family. And that’s okay.

The real magic happened when I started understanding that I don’t owe anyone a place in my life just because we share DNA. Just because someone is technically “family” doesn’t mean they get to hurt you, drain you, or make you feel small. Blood doesn’t equal automatic love or respect. It doesn’t mean you have to keep toxic people around just because society says “family is family.”

My chosen family? They’re everywhere. The friends who’ve become my support system. The communities that have wrapped their arms around me when I needed healing. The people who see me truly see me and love me without condition. I’ve found family in the most unexpected places. In study groups where classmates became lifelines. In community centers where strangers became siblings. In neighborhood gatherings where shared laughter and struggle created bonds stronger than any bloodline.

Here in South Africa, I’ve learned that family is a living, breathing thing. It’s not static. It changes. It grows. It adapts. My chosen family represents the South Africa I believe in which is diverse, supportive and unbreakable.

What choosing your family really means:

– You get to set boundaries

– You get to walk away from relationships that harm you

– You get to define what love looks like

– Blood doesn’t trump respect

– Loyalty is earned, not inherited

To the friends who’ve become my siblings. To the mentors who’ve become my parents. To the communities that have become my home. Thank you for choosing me back.

Some people will say blood is thicker than water. But I say love is thicker than blood. And I choose love. Every. Single. Time. My family isn’t perfect. But they’re mine. And that’s everything.