As planned, Sithandile takes a taxi to go home to her family. They all rejoice with her upon her arrival. She eventually tells her mother that she wants to go to UCT, and the registration fee is R30 000.

Nokuzola: R30 000? You have got to be kidding me, Sithandile. How will I…where will I get that kind of money? Have you told your father yet?

Sithandile: Why does everyone keep asking me about my father?

Nokuzola: Hayi, Sithandile. Have you forgotten that I am your mother? How dare you raise your voice at me like that?

Sithandile: Because! (takes a deep breath) I am sorry, Mama. I just…I don’t want to speak to him. It has been three years since we last spoke, and he hasn’t since made an effort to speak to me or be a part of my life. I don’t know why you would expect me to speak to him now.

Nokuzola: Because he is your father, and you need him.

Sithandile: Need him? Need him, Mama? Look at how much I have grown, look at how much I have achieved without his help. You made me the person I am today, Mama, not him. So, no, I don’t need him.

Nokuzola: Mntanam, I know you are hurt. But you need to calm down and think about your life without your father. Yes, I have tried my best to make sure you survive, but the truth is…

MaNtshilibe: (walking into the lounge) She doesn’t need him; she never has, and she never will. What nonsense are you feeding this child?

Nokuzola: Nonsense? Mama, she needs to hear this.

MaNtshibile: Hear what? That her father is a pathetic failure who doesn’t know what it means to be a man?

Nokuzola: Please don’t do this.

MaNtshilibe: Nokuzola, Sithandile is old now. She deserves to know the truth about her father.

Nokuzola: And what truth is that?

MaNtshilibe: That he never paid intlawulo [damages].

Nokuzola: So, that is what this is about?

MaNtshilibe: Of course, yes. You may see the paying of intlawulo as just a Xhosa tradition stemming from greed, but it is not. Besides the fact that he impregnated you outside of marriage, paying intlawulo is also a sign that he is willing to take responsibility for his child, to show that he is willing to do whatever it takes to be a part of his child’s life. His not doing it has nothing to do with his finances and has everything to do with how irresponsible he is.

Sithandile: (tearing up) Wow. (She storms out to her room.)

Nokuzola: Look at what you did!

MaNtshilibe: The truth will always hurt.

A while later, Nokuzola goes to join Sithandile in her room.

Nokuzola: (wiping her dry hands with her skirt) Ndile, get up, let us talk.

Sithandile: (getting up) Are you tired of providing for me?

Nokuzola: No, why are you asking me that?

Sithandile: Why now, after so many years, do you suddenly want help from my father when it comes to taking care of me?

Nokuzola: Because he promised he would step in as soon as you finished high school. I don’t have R30 000, Sithandile, and I want you to go to UCT. You worked so hard to get in.

Sithandile: If going to UCT means sucking up to my father, then sorry, I am not going.

Nokuzola: Listen, I understand that you are angry but…

Sithandile: No, you don’t, Mama. I am not angry because you want me to speak to my father again when you know how much his absence has wounded me, I am angry because I dealt with this my way. I chose to forgive this man regardless of the fact that he didn’t apologise. I made peace with the fact that he is not a part of my life, and I disowned him as my father. And now you want me to go back to that man? Do you know how much patience and courage it took for me to forgive him? How much it takes for me to not blame his absence whenever things go wrong in my life, wondering if he would have been able to solve them for me? I am sorry, but I am not going to go through this again.

Nokuzola: I hear you, but don’t let pride…

Sithandile: Pride? Pride, Mama? Wow, you know you could have just admitted that yes, you are tired of being a single parent.

Nokuzola: (infuriated) Of course I am tired of being a single parent! It is exhausting to constantly depend on myself to do everything for you as though your father is no longer alive. It is so exhausting that I cannot live my life to the fullest and do the things that I want with my money while your father continues to live comfortably.

Sithandile: (hurt and crying) Oh…I am sorry I…didn’t know I was such a burden to you.

Nokuzola: I didn’t mean it like that, Ndile.

Sithandile: Yes, you did. (She goes outside.)

After she calms down outside, she decides to call Qhama.

Qhama: What did I do right today? Calls from you are rare.

Sithandile: (with a sombre spirit) You are so dramatic.

Qhama: Yes, I am…why do you sound down?

Sithandile: Because I am. Things are not going well, bro.

Qhama: Speak to me, ntwana, what is it?

Sithandile: The UCT thing, the registration fee is very expensive and now everyone is basically forcing me to beg my father to pay some of it. My mother to be specific.

Qhama: Beg your father? I thought you guys were not on speaking terms.

Sithandile: Exactly my point, we haven’t spoken in so long. Imagine me calling now and grovelling for his money. I won’t do that. I told Mom I would rather not go to UCT if that means begging my father.

Qhama: Oh OK…I…

Sithandile: What, you also want me to beg him?

Qhama: No, I just think that you shouldn’t shatter your dream to go to UCT because of this.

Sithandile: Well, no one else will pay my fees.

Qhama: NSFAS?

Sithandile: They haven’t got back to me.

Qhama: I am sorry, ntwana.

Sithandile: Thanks.

Qhama: I still think you should speak to your mother about how you feel.

Sithandile: I tried; she basically told me I was a burden to her.

Qhama: Ouch, were you guys arguing?

Sithandile: Yes, no, kind of.

Qhama: Try speaking to her calmly then. And I know you will hate me for saying this again, but I think you should speak to your father too. I am not saying beg him. Just tell him how you feel and what you need.

Sithandile: It is not that easy.

Qhama: Yes, but you cannot give up on your dreams like this.

Sithandile: What if he doesn’t have the money?

Qhama: You will still have tried. And besides, you know this is about more than money.

Sithandile: OK, wiseman.

Qhama: (laughing) There you go.

Tell us: Can you relate to how Sithandile is feeling? What would you do in her shoes?