As I was walking to school the next day, I noticed the police van was following me yet again. I had nowhere to run to, I was in the middle of nowhere. I picked up my pace as my heart beat faster and faster. I felt my hands sweat. I was scared that the van might be driven by violent policemen. Why was I being followed by the police? I hadn’t done anything wrong.

Just as I was increasing my pace to escape them, I heard my name being called. It was Anelisiwe.

“Pheli! Yho, why are you in such a hurry? The school bell won’t be ringing anytime soon. We are early,” she said, as I halted to wait for her. I was relieved that she had seen me. The police van was now parked at a distance. “What’s the matter? You look frightened.”

“I’m being followed! That police van was following me. It has been following me for some time. What did I do to deserve this? Why am I being followed? I am getting so scared!” I said as I started to cry.

“Shhhh … you’re safe. No-one will ever hurt you. We are in this together. Relax, Pheli. Just breathe in and out and tell yourself you are safe. Maybe we should check the van again tomorrow. You know how these policemen like to gallivant with the vans and check out girls,” she said consoling, her hand rubbing my back.

“I … I … don’t know. This freaks me out.”

“Pheli, you are a strong girl. If the van is there tomorrow, we will go over and ask them their problem.”

I felt a little better. It was good to have a real friend. A friend who empathised with me instead of making fun of what I was going through.

I did not – could not – tell her the truth: that Thabz was putting heavy pressure on me to be part of the robbery they were planning. Since Mongezi, they considered me ‘theirs’.

We were now walking to the school gate faster as the bell had rung. We rushed and luckily the teacher had not come yet.

“Thanks,” I said squeezing her shoulder as we were entering the class. She gave me a smile.

“Here are the two love birds,” Nandi sneered, blocking our way. The class laughed. I glared at her, annoyed by her stinking attitude. I couldn’t believe that the same person I helped get out of many troubles could be the very same person who now made fun of me.

“How are you, lesbians? Are you done kissing outside?”

“Yes. Not that it’s any of your business,” Anelisiwe answered as she pushed Nandi out of the way.

“You sure think highly of yourself, little dweeb,” Nandi said angrily.

“That’s not a crime, genius,” Siwe answered back.

“Tell your friend right there that we intend to make her final year miserable,” hissed Nandi.

“Why don’t you tell her yourself?” retorted Siwe. Then, “Pheli, you’ll have to watch out!” she whispered in my ear as I sat down at my desk.

That day was the longest and most difficult day ever. I was the talk of the school. People made insulting comments. Secrets that my former crew and I agreed to keep private were made viral. Social networking sites were all buzzing with my name and accusations made about me.

Pheli, please tell the school, how you almost slept

with Andile at the party. How you

tried getting him to like you.

Pheli, the school demands to know

how you passed the Maths test that

no-one in school passed. Tell them

how you slept with Deon, the

smartest guy at Parklands High.

Pheli z such a spoilt brat, hu thinks she’s

better thn everybody. Newsflash, Pheli:

You are just a loose girl who hangs out with gangsters.

Shame, what if you’re mommy finds out.

“Pheli, don’t let them get to you. They might be having a field day now, but if you play your cards right you might win the battle. Nothing beats kindness,” Anelisiwe said as we sat behind the classrooms later. I had been crying, avoiding everyone in school.

“Have you seen how people look at me now? Everyone believes these lies about me. How am I going to face the teachers now? I’m now the number one enemy.”

“Pheli, you don’t have to prove anything to anyone. Just be you. Do what you do best.”

“And that’s what exactly?”

“Being you and shining all the way. They can’t stop you from passing. Just do well.”

“I don’t have the energy to face everyone. I can’t. They have won. I quit!”

I felt desperate to avoid the negative attention and scornful looks and made a snap decision: I ran away from school. I was still running, tired and panting, almost at home, when I bumped into Thabz.

He grabbed my arm: “Do you think you are too smart for us now? Huh?”

“No, Thabz, no! I’ve just been too busy.”

“Too busy for your gang? Look here, we need you to help us on this job.”

“Please, Thabz. I told you, I can’t. I’m out of the group.”

“Why? Are you spending all of the time with your new girlfriend? You know I’ve heard the rumours. How long has Mongezi been gone and already you are behaving like a slut. So the gossip is true.”

“Siwe is not my girlfriend.”

“You better meet us on Friday. We’re counting you in, or else we will hurt your new little friend.” he said laughing out loud as he let me pass.

By the time I got home it was half past one. I felt my lungs heave up and down, my heart pound. My hands were shaking as I pulled my key from my backpack to open the door. Then I noticed a pink paper under a brick by the door.

We will meet some day and this nightmare will be long gone and forgotten. Take care of yourself.

Was someone playing a terrible joke on me? I thought of the girls at school and how cruel they could be. I stared at the paper. It was Mongezi’s handwriting, or someone had copied his. Was he alive? Had he left the note? Why hadn’t he waited for me?

I don’t know if it was the heat or the stress but right there on the doorstep I fainted.

***

Tell us: Who do you think wrote the note? Why did they put it there?