“Phendula, Dumi? Silindile.”

U Dumi wajeqeza abazali bakhe. “Angazi ukuthi ngizoqala kuphi ukunichazela,” esho ngokukhulu ukudangala.

“Qala ekuqaleni,” kwaphendula ubaba wakhe, “qala lapho iqala khona lendaba, uze nayo step by step.”

“Kulungile,” kwasho u Dumi. “Kulungile. Besisezifundweni ze Computer, futhi u Mr Troy ube late for class. U Alexa Conradie uhlala eceleni kwami, kukhona abanye abafundi abahla in the row behind us. U Alexa nami we were texting-”

“Texting?” kwabuza ubaba wakhe emangele. “Ngesikhathi sokufunda?”

“Ngiyazi baba ukuthi akuzwakali kahle kodwa sobabili besesiwuqedile umsebenzi esinikwe wona, futhi. . .”

Ngeke akwazi ukuchazela ubaba wakhe ukuthi kumjabulisa kangakanani ukuthola I text evela ku Alexa. Futhi le ayithola yayihambisana nesithombe sika Miss Majola nesoka lakhe.

“U Vuyisile Gaba, Baba. Uyamazi angithi? U Vuyisile Gaba the provincial prop. Ubekhona esikoleni signing autographs. Wonke umuntu ubejabulile ngoba ubezobuka the first fifteen idlala i rugby.”

U Vuyisile Gaba. U Dumi wambona esithombeni esikwi text ka Alexa wazibona engumkhapheyana kakhulu. Isidlakela soqobo u Vuyisile, uMiss Majola wayebukeka emncane kakhulu eceleni kwakhe. U Alexa wathi kwi text:

Sweet, hey?

And he’s soooo fine.

Impendulo kaDumi yathi:

Not that fine. Bit of a jock.

Wathi uAlexa:

Mmm, I wouldn’t mind. You cn neva have too much of what he’s got. Lucky Miss M.

UDumi wathi:

Mmmm??? Lucky? Really???

Wakhungwa umona uDumi. Ngaphambi kokucabanga ukuthi wenzani wavula u Photoshop, iminwe yakhe yasebenza ngokushesha i mouse clicking double-time.

Waphendula u Alexa nge text enesithombe esesinongiwe nge Photoshop.

A bit of a jock and

a bit of a joke too.

Kulesisithombe u Dumi wayesefake isoka lika Miss Majola izinwele ezinde ezi blond, false eyelashes nezindebe ezi pink. Wamgqokisa okomuntu wesifazane – eshaye esincane isiketi u Vuyisile, nesikibha esincane esiveza isisu sonke. Waze wamupha amakhulu amabele. Waqedela ngokumgqokisa ama high heels. Kulesithombe esisha kwakubukeka ngathi u Miss Majola useceleni kwesidlakela somuntu wesifazane omubi.

Not my best work

Kwasho u Dumi nge text.

If I had more time, it would be work of art.

Waphela insini u Alexa ebona lesithombe esisha.

Ubaba ka Dumi wanikina ikhanda ezwa indodana yakhe isifike kulendawo ekubachazeleni. “Kodwa ngempela Dumi ubuwenzani?”, kwasho ubaba wakhe. “Ubusenzelani isithombe, futhi usithumeleleni?”

Amehlo ka Dumi abheka phansi. Wahluleka ukuchazela abazali bakhe ukuthi kwabanjani ebona u Alexa ethathekile ngesoka lika Miss Majola. Wayazi kahle kamhlophe ukuthi u Alexa akasoze achazeka ngaye ngalendlela. Kodwa lokho akulivimbanga igwebu le jealousy alizwa lakheka esifubeni sakhe.

“Okulandelayo,” waqhubeka nokuchazela abazali bakhe, “okwenzekile ukuthi u Luke Owen grabbed Alexa’s phone.”

U Dumi wathula isikhashana, wanikina ikhanda ebheke phansi.

“Qhubeka nendaba, Dumi,” kwasho ubaba wakhe.

“U Luke grabbed Alexa’s phone and he scrolled on the screen. Alexa ubemcela ukuthi ayibuyise,” kwasho u Dumi.

“So, Princess Dumi doesn’t like jocks,” kwasho uLuke ehlinile.

“Come on Luke,” kwasho uDumi ezincengela, “It was just something I sent to Alexa,OK?”

“Something for Alexa, hey? Dumi is sending love pics to Alexa. You got a thing for Alexa?” kwasho u Luke.

“No. No.” U Dumi wazizwa ecasuka ngalesisenzo sika Luke kodwa wehlisa umoya ngoba ingekho into angayenza kulesi sidlakela sensizwa. “It was just a joke,” kwasho uDumi.

U Luke wathi, “Ngiyabona Princess Dumi, ihlaya into enjena kuwena. Let’s share the laughter, hey?

“Just give it back, OK?”

“Stop being a douche. It’s just a joke, bru. You said it yourself.” U Luke waqalaza abangani bakhe abaseceleni kwakhe, banqekuzisa amakhanda bevumelana naye.

Bathi, “Yeh dude, stop being a douche.”

“Futhi vele,” kwaqhubeka u Luke, “ lo Miss Majola wakhona uyazitshela.”

U Alexa wadinwa kakhulu, wasukuma wama phezu kwe desk lika Luke. Wakhipha isandla wathi, “OK, Luke. You’ve had your fun. My phone please.”

“Uyayifuna? Sure uzoyithola. Just give me a second.” Wayithinta i phone wayibuyisa.

Esebuyela endaweni yakhe u Alexa wayehlahle amehlo ebuka u Dumi. Wamhlebela ethi, “Shit, Dumi. Luke just shared the picture.

“Delete it, Alexa, quick!”

Kodwa it was too late. Bonke abafundi were on their cellphones, bebuka lesi sithombe. Bonke bahleka.

“Sicela ningahleki please,” kwasho u Alexa, “That image was supposed to be private.”

Kodwa okwenzekile kusuke sekwenzekile. Isithombe asinonga nge Photoshop ezama ukuhlekisa u Alexa sasabalala isikole sonke.

“Yilokho okwenzekile. Bengingacabangi ukuthi isithombe sizofika ku Luke and he would share it. Ngiyaxolisa baba, nawe ma . Isithombe sesigcwele ku Facebook.”

“Kodwa nawe Dumi, it was a stupid thing to do,”kwasho ubaba wakhe. “Sizozwa ekuseni ukuthi uthini u Principal wakho”

UDumi waziphonsa embhedeni. U Luke nabangani bakhe bambiza nge Loser, elele embhedeni ecabanga i flop ayishayile, wazizwa eyi Loser ngempela.

*****

“Dumi! Vuka!”

Ngabe uyaphupha? Ngabe sekuyisikhathi sokuya esikoleni njalo? Kodwa kanjani ngoba usanda kulala nje. Ubusuku bonke ubephenduphenduka ecabanga lento eyenzekile. Mhlawumbe it won’t be so bad. Mhlawumbe kuzosa isiphelile yonke lento. Futhi no Miss Majola uzosibona isithombe azihlekele abone ukuthi u Dumi ungumfana omncane odlala ukuba jeaulous.

Amazwi kamama wakhe alandelayo awaqeda wonke amathemba ayenawo okuthi lento uzovuka isidlulile. “Vuka Dumi. Usheshise. U Principal ufonile wathi ufuna ukusibona before classes start.”

Before school? Bengithi sizombona ngo ten?”

“Uthe ufuna ukuqala ngalento before school starts. Uthe sekunama developments in the case.”

“The case?” u Dumi waphindelela lamagama kancane. Manje sekuthiwa i the case? The case of Dumi Totobela and the Offensive Artwork.

***

Sitshele ukuthi ubona kanjani: Ubani ozohlukumezeka ngokusabalala kwalesithombe? UDumi kumele ejeziswe ngalokhu okwenzekile?