The morning air enveloped me as I woke up. The air was so thick and heavy as if each breath required an effort of its own. My heart seemed to have taken up residence in my throat, making even the simplest task – like breathing – feel like a challenge.

Anxiety held me captive throughout the night, denying me rest. My thoughts were a whirlwind, each one revolving around Lindiwe and the impending pregnancy test. I had tossed and turned last night, seeking solace in the darkness, but my mind refused to quiet down.

Engaging in various activities had been my attempt to distract myself from the impending moment that was about to come. I needed to keep my mind occupied to prevent it from wandering into the realm of possibilities that awaited me.

Even the presence of my uncle, a constant source of unease, failed to divert my thoughts today. Glancing at the clock, its hands seemed frozen at 2:34 p.m., time refusing to budge. My leg jiggled involuntarily, matching the rhythm of my racing heart. Lindiwe should have arrived by now.

A knock echoed, instantly catching my breath. For a moment, I felt paralysed, unsure of what to do. I took a deep breath, steeled myself, and headed towards the door. Lindiwe stood there, her presence a soothing balm for my restless soul. With a gulp, I led her inside.

As she handed me the pregnancy kit, my hands trembled with a mix of fear and anticipation. This was the moment of truth. With shaky hands, I accepted it and retreated to the bathroom, following the instructions meticulously. Lindiwe entered as soon as I was done peeing. Her presence was providing me with a lifeline.

After what felt like an eternity, even though it had only been 3 minutes, I came out from the bathroom, with Lindiwe following close behind. I handed her the pregnancy test. I am not ready to look at it, not when I feel like I am about to faint. Lindiwe accepted the test. I licked my now dry lips trying to calm my thumping heart. She met my gaze solemnly. She didn’t need to speak; her eyes conveyed the message loud and clear. I slowly took the pregnancy test back, and the two lines confirmed my worst fear. I am pregnant.

My palms grew clammy, and my heart raced as I stared at the test in my hands. I closed my eyes momentarily, hoping that when I opened them, it would all prove to be a nightmare. But reality remained unyielding; the truth was staring back at me.

Collapsing onto the cold tiles, tears streamed down my face.

“What’s happening here?” My uncle’s voice cut through the tension as he entered the lounge, his loud voice breaking through the chain of thoughts that had formed in my mind. His gaze landed on the pregnancy test, his anger evident in his eyes.

Lindiwe’s words broke the tension, offering a way out of this uncomfortable situation. “I guess this is my cue to leave,” she said softly, reading the room.

She turned to me. “Will you be okay?” she whispered softly, conveying genuine care. I nodded, even though all I wanted was for her to stay, but I knew that I could not risk letting her stay. With a final hug, she left, leaving me to face the storm alone.

My uncle’s piercing gaze locked onto me, his question hanging in the air. “Are you pregnant?” The words were heavy with accusations. Nervously, I wiped away my tears and nodded. The room seemed to close in as he paced.

“No,” he said firmly, his gaze averted. “You are now damaged.” He spat out, with a twisted smile forming on his lips. His chilling words hung in the air. “This means I can now have your sister.”

As he left the room, I felt like dying, like the walls in my chest were closing in, refusing me a chance to breathe. My nails dug at my skin, scraping the skin off. I will never let him touch Zizipho, never.