The Answer lies in her eyes.

That is what I will tell my Prof tomorrow. So that he can report it to the UN who will report it to the Luthanian commander-in-chief. The Answer lies in her eyes!

My Prof will be annoyed with me. He will feel that I am not taking this job seriously. And he has pulled many strings to get me hired –seeing I haven’t been employed since way back in the summer of 2036. As I mentioned before.

Not much call for a pianist these days. My ex-audiences are far more attuned to the staccato of machine-gun fire, the rhythmic crackle of an AK-47, the rising pitches of another ambulance on its way to another morgue. Once more with feeling!

They say music can soothe the savage breast. But music doesn’t stand a chance against the current savagery.

“Don’t be facile, Josh. This is no time for silliness!” That’s what my Prof will say from beneath his wild-bush eyebrows, pursing his lips so the canyons of his face deepen.

“You keep your libido under wraps, Josh, and concentrate on the job at hand. Your womanizing has always been your weakness.”

Outside his UCT lecture-room, the Tuesday street-battles will be raging in full blood. Not much different from the Monday riots. Just another average day in Cape Town, South Africa, Planet Earth. Which is not much different from another average day in Paris. Or New York. Or Li Li’s Xian.

But I will stick to my guns (if you’ll pardon the pun!).

‘No, Prof. It’s not my libido at work here. Though I must admit …’ No, better not admit how attractive I find their musicologist! Nor how being alone with her in my flat has set my blood racing.

So rather, I will say: ‘No, Prof. It’s not my libido at work here. Just careful observation. I tell you, comparing the harmonies and scales of Luth will get us nowhere. The Answer is there in her eyes. Just let me explain, yeah?’

Wild-bush eyebrows rising in irritation. Tomorrow. He is a man under pressure, my Prof. The Luthanians are growing exasperated. And I don’t blame them.

Already I am imagining how it will be: me, the hero and saviour of our planet! Me, feted the world over. Me, on all the news channels:

It has taken a young Zulu man from the southern reaches of Africa, from the grass roots of Soweto, to find the Answer! And he has found the Answer in the eyes of a Luthanian female.


Tell us what you think: Are a lot of famous male musicians probably as promiscuous and arrogant as Josh about their sexual abilities?