“Comrade President, I have arrived. I am here to serve. Any marching orders, chief?” I say, as I embrace Chris, my host and the President of SATSU.

It’s midday now and we are standing in the parking lot at the Technikon. But as they say, the day is still young.

“Mchana, look around. This is where we are going to party tonight! Forget about the marching orders from Tanzania, Angola, Russia, and China. We are in power now. We must party like there’s no tomorrow! We didn’t struggle to become the boring, old stick-in-the-mud crew like the former Robben Islanders. I mean Oom Gov still lectures us on the principles of communism! In 1996 for crying out loud!”

My beeper signals another message. I let it ring just to hear my ringtone: In My Time by Teddy Pendergrass. This is my time. I check the beeper; it is a message from Vukile, one of my boys from KwaZulu-Natal. He tells me that their Rector agreed to hire the spacious VW Caravelle 2.6i for them. This is a car fit for hosting a party for women and is known as ‘Ibhasi Lomjolo’, The Love Bus, in KZN. I lose my mind.

I say to Chris, “My leader, Vukile, is bringing a VW 2.6i Caravelle! Can you believe it?”

Chris is stunned. “That Vukile has his Rector wrapped around his finger. All the other comrades only managed to get small cars. Technikon SA comrades were complaining that their Rector only approved they hire a VW Golf 1.”

“My leader, when we drive in convoy to New Brighton with ‘Ibhasi Lomjolo’ at the front we won’t have to say a word. Women will scream and run to us. Tonight is the night!” I say. It can’t come soon enough.

Messages stream through our beepers as we talk the politics of entertainment; comrades are touching down in droves at the airport. We decide to go big, not home, as they say.

We drive to the Port Elizabeth CBD in Chris’s Toyota bakkie. We buy 10 medium-size cooler boxes and a whopping 240 dumpies of various fine beers – orders from our comrades. The favourite beer amongst comrades right now is Amstel Lager, followed closely by Hansa Pilsener.

These are signs of the times. Our leaders from exile, the Mass Democratic Movement (MDM), and Robben Island are now running the State. As their understudies, we are in charge of student representatives’ councils on various campuses. There’s a new energy in the country as the wave of change is sweeping across the land. These are good times for us. We rule the roost!

“My chief, I believe tonight will separate the boys from the men. We are going to have fun with the girls,” I say, emphasising the word as we drive out of the CBD.

Chris is a warm, genial, fun-loving, and Christ-worshipping fellow. He takes his time to hook onto my excitement. But then, like a shot out of the blue, he says, “There’s this Andiswa woman, Mchana. She is perfect for you. I know you love them slim, tall, and yellow boned.”

I laugh until I cry.

“I am all ears,” I say.

***

Tell us: Do you think this is an accurate reflection of how young men talk about women, even today? Do young women talk about young men like this too?