I froze and re-read what he had crossed out. Kiss a girl had been crossed out with red ink. Was that all I meant to him? I’d just been some item on his to-do list and when he’d finished with me, he’d crossed me out. How could I have been so stupid? Afua had tried to warn me but I hadn’t listened. And to think I’d almost given myself to him. I heard Chidi’s car outside. I was still holding the diary when I went downstairs. He smiled when he saw me and then the expression on his face changed.

“You told me it was the best day of your life. But it wasn’t. It was just something you had to cross off your list. Are you happy now? You’ve got what you wanted. You can stop pretending and tell the whole school how easy it was for you to have me.”

“What are you talking about?”

I thrust the book into his face and pointed at what he’d crossed out. Brother Emeka came out of the kitchen.

“What’s going on?”

I was shaking so hard, I couldn’t speak.

“It’s a misunderstanding,” Chidi said to his father.

I couldn’t bear to hear anymore. I dropped the book and ran out of the house. Chidi ran after me but I was faster which surprised me. I wasn’t that good at sports but Chidi couldn’t keep up with me. Dad was on the phone when I got in.

“She just came in,” I heard him say. I went past him and up the stairs to my bedroom where I locked myself in.

Chidi was knocking at my door a few minutes later. “Gyikua, please, I can explain, let me explain, please.”

I heard Dad come up and lead him away. Then Dad came and knocked and asked to come in. He must have been there for about ten minutes and then he left. It felt as if my heart had physically been torn into a hundred different pieces and each piece had been left to marinate in methylated spirit. How could he be so mean? My phone rang. It was Chidi. I cut the call and turned the phone off. I climbed into bed and tried to make my mind go blank, but I couldn’t. It hurt too much. How much of us had been real and how much had been a sham? Had I been so lonely that I had trusted the first person who called himself my friend? I didn’t know what to do to make the pain stop. It was too much.

I was startled by the sound of a drill. I watched in disbelief as the drill bit cut through the wood around the lock and the door handle. The lock fell out and Dad pushed the door open.

“I had to make sure you were okay.”

He put the drill down, walked inside and sat by my side. I covered my head with my cloth and turned away from him.

Dad put his hand on my shoulder. “Chidi’s sick. When you went to Accra on Saturday, he had a test done on his bone marrow. Emeka just told me the results are in and they’re not good. He has acute leukaemia. He’s had it on and off since he was twelve. He was in remission before they came to Ghana. He started feeling really tired after he got the cold and Emeka suspected the cancer was back, that’s why he was crying that day in my office. The doctor says the cancer is back. They might have to go to Nigeria before the end of the week for him to begin treatment. Emeka is taking him for a blood transfusion in the morning. I think you two should talk.”

I didn’t move. Dad gave my shoulder another squeeze and left the room. I lay in bed for a full ten minutes. Cancer? How? He looked fine. He was fine.