Today marks the end of the first six months of the year. I’d love to reflect on the first half of the year and how far I am with the goals I set for myself when the year begun. Sadly, there’s not much I’ve done! The past six months were a rollercoaster. I just couldn’t wait for the semester to come to an end so that I can have time to evaluate myself and see where things went wrong.

I mean, I had it all planned out. I remember when I wrote this entry A Good Start, everything seemed so right. My mind was in the right place. And everything seemed possible. I thought I could achieve anything that I put my mind to. I felt in total control of my destiny!

But somehow…along the line, things started going wrong! I lost control and things started going south! I don’t know if moving out of home so that I could move in with Noxy had an effect in how things turned out for me. But things started falling apart roundabout that time. There were toooo many tests to write within one week, back to back assignments and on top of that I had just begun working! In short, my schedule was a nightmare and I didn’t know what I was doing!

I guess that’s around the time I started not giving a fuck about all the goals that I had set for myself when the year begun! I hardly had time to read the books I bought. I’ve hardly touched K. Sello Duiker’s Thirteen Cents, thanks to a crazy prescription of books by our English lecturers who made sure that we had enough material to read until 2018. But most of the books they prescribed were BORING!

So, I haven’t read Steve Biko’s I Write What I Like as I had planned as part of my New Year resolutions. One other thing I haven’t done is learn a foreign language. I have a Kenyan friend on Facebook though. She’s teaching me a few words and I’m also teaching her basic Xhosa words. I’m learning about her country and its literature.

I find it funny that I’ve not yet read any of the writers from Kenya. She introduced me to Wainana Binyavanga and some of Kenya’s prolific writers. It’s been an experience, but when things started getting out of control our correspondence was put aside for a while.

I guess the only goal I’ve achieved so far is that of making more new friends. This is evident with Linda, my friend who is also a writer and spoken word poet! I’m proud of the friendships that I’ve made in the past six months. I mean, I’ve met new people and grown in some aspects of life. I guess the past 6 months were not as bad as I make them sound because at the end of the day I managed to pass all my modules – although I didn’t pass with the 75% I had initially hoped for. And that’s what matters, right?

I just lost control but the ship didn’t sink. I managed to steer it to the shore. The vacation break will give me enough time to get ready for another journey at sea when the second semester begins…I hope I’m ready for this one!

ZZ xxx

Dish it: have you achieved the goals you set for yourself at the beginning of the year?

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