This morning I woke up feeling like shit! It’s one of those very rare but unappreciated days when one feels reluctant to kick the blankets and face the cold world, or at least that is until one hears words that she has longed to hear for a very long time.
It could be words from someone who picks you up every time you are down and hopeless; it’s only a coincidence that to me that that someone happens to be Sebastian!
When I woke up, and noticed how down my spirits were, I felt a burning urge to call him. I knew hearing his sexy, sultry voice would do me wonders. He is my magician without a wand.
I knew hearing his voice would lighten up the day no matter how gloomy! But then I decided against it. Emotional dependence is very dangerous for anyone; it’s more likely to become an obsession! And ya’ll know Zee and obsession do not run on the same track, right?
Anyways, his mother is still in town watching his every move like a hawk spying on a chicken. Only God knows why she is still around. If there is one person in this world who has mastered the art of spoiling my day just by thinking of them – it’s her! She really makes me sad and takes whatever joy in my life away. It’s exactly people like her who can make one not look forward to a new day; they make you want to snuggle in bed all day long.
And then mom just decides to burst into my room and demand an explanation as to why I am sleeping till late, she says her house is not a house for patients who can sleep till whatever time they want to.
“Ma, please! Not now. Now I just feel indifferent to everything; indifferent to life’s limitations; indifferent to not seeing people when you want to see them! Sometimes I feel like I am too different – and being too different makes you lonely sometimes!” I don’t know what actually took over me to say those words. But I guess loneliness was gnawing deep inside my heart. Loneliness makes you bitter.
“Different? Well, I will forever be grateful to the Living Lord for the way you are my princess! Some girls out there are just trollops flying after men.” She can be sarcastic when she chooses to be.
And for a moment she was silent, thinking deep, paging through the piles of memorabilia in her mind. And when she had found what she was looking for she continued: “Aunty B was telling me just the other day about her own Sindisiwe, girl is barely sixteen, but has dropped out of school and is expecting already! I swear I could see tears welling up in Betty’s eyes when she told me that sordid tale. You are not the best child in this world, but still you are worth three of any typical girl my dear,”
“You are worth three of any typical girl!”
When you hear your mom say those words I am telling you, there’s no way those blankets will be too heavy for you to kick away and face a new day. There’s no way in hell that a mother-in-law’s indifference towards you can hold you down. You just go out there and you want to share those words with the world; so you make sure that you steal a few minutes from your hectic class schedule to let a few loyal friends know that you are having a great day!
Toodles! Lunch time is over…
ZZ xxx