I interviewed my friend Oyama about her feelings on friendship.
 

Buzwekazi: If your best friend was a fictional character, who would they be and why? 

Oyama: Well, if my best friend was a fictional character, I think they would be like Hermione Granger from the Harry Potter series. Just like Hermione, my best friend is incredibly smart, always has the answers to everything, and is always there to lend a helping hand. They’re also fiercely loyal and always stand up for what’s right, even if it’s not the popular thing to do. Plus, they have a great sense of humour and can always make me laugh when I’m feeling down. Overall, I think Hermione Granger would be the perfect fictional representation of my real-life best friend.

Buzwekazi-  If you could use 3 descriptive words about what friendship means to you, what would you say? 

 Oyama- Compassion, love and care 

Buzwekazi-What is the basis of friendship to you?

 Oyama-The depth of interaction I have with someone determines my friendship with them.

Buzwekazi- What are your sweetest moments of friendships?

 Oyama- Being Listened to and allowed space to express myself has to be one of the sweetest things about friendships. Also experiencing growth and inspiration are a highlight.

Buzwekazi- Have you ever experienced any difficulties in friendships? If you have, what were they?

Oyama – Yes I have, It has been when a friend and I have conflicting ideas or views and challenges to come to a resolution, after realisation that we are different therefore are bound to have different views.

Buzwekazi- Are you attracted to friends of similar or opposite interests?

Oyama:  I am attracted to those of similar interest

Buzwekazi- Do you think that there are any requirements needed for friendship?  

Oyama- Not really, every friend and friendship is different. 

Buzwekazi-Is unconditional love a thing in friendships?

Oyama- Yes, God called us to love each other unconditionally. Firstly a person decides to be part of a friendship,  and is not forced and therefore you need to be able to express love unconditionally. 

Buzwekazi-Have you ever been loved unconditionally? If so, how did you know that you were loved unconditionally?

 Oyama-  Yes I have, there are some friends that are self-less, able to see past themselves even though they are going through their own challenges they are still able to avail themselves to help me with my own.

Buzwekazi-How do you move from offence in friendships? Or how do you address offence in friendships?

 Oyama- Offence is taken from expectations that we have of people. I would take offence when a friend has not been opening up to me about certain struggles. And I move past offence by  Suggesting to speak about things. 

This interview was written as part of the Fundza Fellowship Programme.