“You want me to say something? That’s cool coz I have a whole lot to say to you. Antonio had really convinced me that leaving this country was gonna be the best thing to happen to us. Hit Mexico, Colombia, Malibu, yes we could afford that! I thought of that life, I craved it all. I needed was to go out there, marry some other fool again, blow his account and keep on moving. But I took a second to think of this guy; the most adorable, sweetest, handsome thing ever. That was you. I wanted to slap Antonio for even wiping off your account. I told him I’d follow him but deep down I knew I’d rather stay in this damp of a town just to see you, to try to mend things, to give you every bit of your cent back, coz I never needed that. I hated myself for everything I did. For the accident, for loosing your job, because I thought you are the sweetest thing that ever happened to this earth.”

“Babe, I’m sorry… I…”

“Mantoa told me everything, the abusive bastard you are, the lying, the cheating, the isolation. I don’t even blame her anymore. I used to hate her for being such a bitch to you when you needed her the most. But now I know it all; I know all about you.”

“What exactly did Mantoa tell you?”

“Everything, everything dammit! That the child who has been dropped here is yours and his mother is just a thirteen-year-old child that you’ve been cheating on Mantoa with.”

Thirteen! I mean Kgomotso was too young but she was 21, not thirteen. Damn that bitch Mantoa was good.

“And you chose to believe all that crap she has been feeding you? Do you also believe that I have something to do with Filwe’s disappearance?”

“I don’t know what to believe because when you were busy fighting the police, this fell off your trouser.” She took out Filwe’s ribbon from her purse. “I bought her this and I know she wore it the day she disappeared.”

“Babe, I saw it at the office and I didn’t know what to think and…”

“It’s too late for explanations Sbu! You should have told me all that when I came to the office yesterday.”

I couldn’t believe that she was actually doubting me. She thought I was capable of kidnapping my own child? Yes she was mine, nothing could ever change that.

“I’m glad that Martin fought to take you out because I just couldn’t sleep with the thought of you in a dark, creepy place like prison.”

“I sense a but!”

“I need time to think things through,”

“Are you throwing us out?”

“I wouldn’t do that. This house is yours, it has always been yours.”

“Babe what are you saying?”

“I need to think things through. My things are all packed, I just had to make sure that you are fine first.”

“What do you mean all packed, are you even prepared to come back?”

“Depends,”

“On what?”

“I really can’t talk now.”

She got out of bed, changed without even bothering to take a shower or a bath.
Maggie, one of her helpers, got in the bedroom as if ordered to and took her luggage out of the closets. There were so many of them I lost count. I sat there feeling helpless and she was placing some of her cosmetics in her toiletry bag.

I felt tears wet my eyes. I realised for the first time in my life that without her I was nothing. She came back in my life and turned it around when I had lost all hope. She chose me among all the other men.

“Please take your medication. I’m leaving with a cab; I’ll leave the car behind. Joe agreed to drive you around. Please try to read Fentse a bed time story when she goes to bed otherwise she’ll never go to sleep…”

She wanted to go on giving me instructions but tears started pouring out of her eyes and so were mine.

“I hope you get to bond with your little champ. Since we don’t know his name, I think you should call him Joy, maybe that’s what he’ll bring in your life.”

“I don’t want you to go. I want you to take care of him, of us all.”

“I have to… I can’t stay here with all this anger and frustration I have in me. I’ll end up taking it out on all of you. I think the driver is waiting.”

“Where are you going?”

“Take care of yourself Sbu, if not for yourself then for me.”

I felt like going crazy. She was leaving for real, all because of the things Mantoa told her about me. I grabbed her by the hem of her dress and she pulled away and left without even turning back not even once.

***

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