Life has its way of teaching us valuable lessons, if you grow up in a home where you aren’t openly educated about the repercussions of certain actions. Now there is a way to educate a child, and that way is certainly not the way my family considered educating me. All I recall hearing from childhood is my family constantly comparing me to other kids as if we functioned the same way. For that reason, I could never embrace who I was as a child and, in a way, it grew with me. I now know that our black society has to work on our approach to having important talks with our kids, and we should actually grow with our kids instead of expecting them to always to make wise decisions without being guided through life.

Sphesihle gazed at me with his gorgeous brown eyes and suddenly, I was shy. The bad girl that walked into the club vanished and I was my usual self again, the sweet Lebo. As he was about to begin talking to me, the DJ played our song by Rocco, a famous deep house DJ, ‘All Over Again’. Out of excitement we went straight to the general section and burned the club down with our dance moves. I couldn’t recall the last time I had that much fun.

Sphe and I used to manage to have fun despite our busy schedule of trying to graduate. I remember the days when he was just my light. He was what most girls fantasised about: loving, tall, light skinned, sexy, a great singer, and he was a genius! He was just the man of every girl’s dreams. When he left I was devastated but happy for him as I knew he was going to build his life for the better. He truly deserved the opportunity to enhance his inner genius, and where better to do that than Harvard?

Chris came at the right time, a time when I was desperate to fill in the gap made by Sphe’s absence. That on its own made me ignore a lot of the bad qualities he possessed, which was the biggest mistake I could have ever made. I guess my need to feel secure got the better of me.

Sphe excited me and what I loved most about him was the fact that I could see in his eyes how ecstatic he was about life. To me, that meant a lot, because I couldn’t possibly have imagined someone feeling such a way around me, of all people.

I don’t know, it could have been the booze or the house music we often played that excited everyone or how happy we were. The hustle we did together was on another level. As I have mentioned, Sphe was the smart guy, the one who just had faith in my creativity. He always encouraged me to work on my craft, and taught me all about time management in order to graduate. He always mentioned how much he wanted me to become independent and to become the best version of myself, and that made me fully aware of how much potential he saw in me, potential I didn’t seem to think I had.

Tell us: Do you think Lebo and Sphe will get back together?