We spoke on the phone for a few minutes and then he asked me what I was doing. Immediately I told him I was free and I was up for anything. He asked if we could meet at our usual spot, which was an abandoned building just a few blocks from my home. We were always safe there and no one could see us. There was an old couch that he said his uncle wanted to throw out so he took it. Along with the couch was a small table and few kitchen accessories. It was just perfect for us!

I used to call it ‘our love nest’, it was like our house. Sipho was the man of course, he was the one that fended. I, of course, was the housewife, the praying woman. Our love would blossom there, actually, it was the only place I could meet him. At school we’d pretend we were like anybody else, just classmates. But deep down, I knew we were more than that, we had something special.

That time, the moment he asked if we could meet I agreed, I never disagreed to meet up with Sipho. I’d make excuses and lie to father just to see him, studies and church programs were always there to save me. Yes, I put my studies before Sipho, I used them as an excuse to father. Sipho respected my education, he knew it was very important to me and he understood how intelligent I was. That was one of the reasons he taught me to stand up for my dreams. He would always say “My smart queen, why let your dreams turn into dust? Why let your intelligence go to waste?”

Sipho was also very smart and he was the wisest boy with words I ever knew. I always told him he’d make a great novelist one day. He played with words like a soccer ball, just so amazing. I always thought we’d make a great couple one day, a power couple.

The moment I hung up, I was already at the door. I took the key, stepped out and made sure I locked the door. I felt excited as I walked to our special spot. I’d always find him there, people were hardly in that street and I knew it was safe. I grew up knowing that I wasn’t allowed to date. I had rejected any boy that approached me my entire life. Only that year when Sipho approached me, something inside me made me agree. I won’t tell a lie: I had always had a crush on Sipho. Whenever I saw him, I felt myself go red. That day when he came to me, flirting around until he asked if I could be his girlfriend, I felt, for the first time, butterflies flying around in my stomach. I felt my knees weaken when he was around and I was as light as a feather.

I loved meeting him and I always felt excitement go through my body. He was like this cocaine that affected me, I felt so alive when I was with him. He was my adrenaline, the spirit that had awoken me. There was never a time in my life when I had felt so alive!

It a few minutes, I was already at the building. It was a double story and I liked it when we played around in the house. When he first took me there, I was scared. I didn’t like being in such a big abandoned place, but he held me close and put me in his arms. I felt warm and nothing scared me anymore.

That time, I entered and ran up the stairs as I was sure he was waiting for me with a surprise. And I was right! He was standing there, looking handsome as always. I felt that adrenaline again as I walked towards him. He smiled that beautiful smile of his, it always seemed to drive me crazy. It made me feel as if I was on top of the world.

He held my hand and gave me a soft kiss on the check. “How are you, my baby?”

I blushed and then responded to his greetings softly, I looked down and bit my lower lip. He raised my head with his soft hand and gave me something, a chocolate bar. He always had something nice for me and along with each came a message. For that gift he said: “Something sweet for my sweet baby, just to keep you sweeter than sugar for me.”

I enjoyed spending every moment with him. He sat down on the couch and I sat on his lap. We would talk for hours and afterwards we played around in the building. We’d run around like five-year-old children, I remember I almost fell and he caught me in his arms. Instead of helping me up, he decided to enjoy the moment and we just froze like that. I felt so…I was never able to explain that feeling and even today I can’t. He kissed me softly on the lips and then helped me up, I felt shy and silly.

I felt as if we were these white teenagers, naughty and free. When I was with Sipho, I felt alive! I didn’t get it! I used to be this goody-two-shoes. I was a holier than thou, that was why I hardly had any friends growing up. I’d spend most of my time with Enhle and Zweli. They were my best friends those times, I mean all the children thought I acted better than them and they didn’t want to play with me. I only started having friends in primary school.

Well, that day time flew so fast and soon I found myself having to leave Sipho. He always said we should leave separately and would always let me leave first. What a gentleman he was. He was my handsome Zulu boy.

I was able to rush home just before father got home. Father didn’t like cold food and he wanted his food fresh and hot when he came back from his church functions. I immediately got to work and set the pots on the stove. I decided to cook spaghetti and fish that evening. Father was a modern man and he didn’t mind it when I cooked him such food.

I feel like laughing when I remember how I almost burned down the house that evening. I was watching TV again and the pots were on the stove. I was thinking about my love, day dreaming. All of a sudden there was a lot of smoke and something smelled burned. It was my fish! The moment I finished throwing it away and cleaning the pot, I heard father’s car. I ended up having to use tuna that night. That was one of the funniest moments in my life, but father enjoyed the meal and everything went well.

***

Tell us: How much longer is she going to be able to keep up this pretence? Is it right to have a relationship your parents don’t know about?