To be fair, I was never like this, but I would be committing an offence if I don’t bring you into this life of which I have lived for the undeserving instead of doing it for my family, true friends and for the people who truly supported and believed in me. The notion of the betrayal I made to myself goes right back in the same village that was supposedly to love me unconditionally as one of their own. From the very beginning, it seemed pretty obvious that everyone had a tough time accepting the animal I was as in their eyes. Funny enough there was nothing unusual about my appearance.

Even the ones at my age used to pick on me and this was fairly the trend or rather it became the norm of my living days. I never felt welcomed in that filthy village as much as I’m supposedly to be one of them. Don’t get me wrong not everyone is as much as the same in that dark hole, however the experiences that I endured, got me painting it on the way it had also painted me.

The way I grew up, was unbearable. If it wasn’t fights, it was being blamed for things I had no idea how they could be associated with me in the first place. It’s quite interesting how strong I was despite all the madness. I had never reported this to my family. I was the lone wolf going about all the daily struggles and doing whatever it took to stay out of trouble.

As I grew up and started being in school I had hoped that I would leave all the hatred behind, however what was about to step in my path turned out to be one of the worst case scenarios of my life. This is at the time when I lost all of my consciousness as I was slowly lured upon the wrong deeds of this world. The time I started to turn my back on all the teachings of love, humanity and dignity. I started to experiment. I did as I wanted. I wanted to be the cool kid as it was in the day. I wanted was to feel appreciated.

I left my real behind, because of the influence of the ones I thought were cool. They were the kind of friends who believed they had life figured out. I must say, I was amongst them and I shouldn’t put the blame on them as much as they outplayed me. They capitalized my vulnerable side and they did so without failing or missing an inch. I was in the band and enjoying the good company I longed for. To me, those were the happiest days. At least I would like to fool myself that actually those were the best days.

Sizo was still with me at the time. I enjoyed his company now and then since we no longer spent as much as time together as we used to. But it didn’t really matter at least to me since I had already been used to this kind of arrangement of which I simultaneously created. I absolutely did not care how he felt about it nor did that cross my mind. However this is not to say I no longer loved my friend, it’s just that we no longer had the same connection we once had growing up, as much as the guy did all he could to be my friend.

He would warn me whenever he had the chance to do so. But I was not about to listen to whatever he was preaching, that’s how I was.

Tell us: Do you believe it is important to choose your friends wisely?