I had a lot of opportunities to leave, but I never did. Even now, I can just up and leave, but I won’t, I can’t, and I believed I never will. I stared at her beautiful facial features as she slept peacefully next to me, and she was snoring lightly. Our relationship was like that of a drug addict and a druggie. I always said I was done, but I never actually was. I knew that she loved me, as much as she hit me.

I had met her about three months prior, and she was perfect. I had just gotten out of a bad relationship with a self-absorbed girl, and when I found her, I saw an absolute angel. She listened to me, and she was both caring and funny. She took me out, and she was always tender and gentle with me.

At first, I was hesitant. I was always the masculine girl in my relationships, so, being the masculine one, I was used to pampering others, not being pampered. But she bought me flowers. Imagine, me, receiving flowers! So, she was an exception, and she was different to what I was used to.

She worked as a manager in clothing store. She was just 25 years old at the time, and she was independent, beautiful, and stood her ground. I was not used to that.

She had shoulder length black hair, coffee coloured skin, dimples on both of her cheeks, and full lips. But, as I watched her sleeping peacefully, I was almost tempted to take the pillow and suffocate her to death. I just could not do it, though. I loved her. We had broken up a few times before, a lot of times, actually, but we always found a way back to each other.

Oh, here I am going on and on about her, and you do not even know anything about me. I forgot to mention this, but I was only fifteen years old at the time. Some of you may think our relationship was doomed because she was older than me, and that is why she had control over me, but I beg to differ.

Anyway, back to her. I stared at her while she was sleeping, admiring her beauty. I loved her. No matter what she did to me, I loved her. I closed my eyes as I felt a pain coming from my stomach. She had beaten me again, and I had fresh wounds.

“Mhhh,” I said, under my breath.

I was trying very hard not to wake her up. But she moved, so I sat still. “Have I woken her up?” I wondered. She was in a bad mood, so if she woke up, she would probably hit me again. I quickly closed my eyes again, and I felt her arm reaching out for me in the dark. She pulled me closer to her, so I opened my eyes. She was smiling at me, showing her perfect white teeth. I smiled too, hiding the pain and hatred I felt for her inside.

“I love you,” she said in her honey sweet voice.

“I love you too,” I responded in a low voice.

After a while, she leaned forward and kissed my lips. I was taken by her love all over again, and the hatred I felt for her dissolved. She pulled me closer to her again, and her hands played at the back of my neck, and her tongue played with mine. Her hands went down to my waist, and when she touched my stomach, I winced and pulled back.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, concerned.

“I’m … it’s fine,” I responded, gently pushing her away.

She sat up, switched the light on, and turned her attention to me. I sat up too, scared. She had a serious look on her face, the one she had before raising her hand to hit me. I closed my eyes, ready to take whatever was coming my way.

***

Tell us: What advice would you give someone who is going through what our main character is going through?