Not every situation requires a yes, sometimes it is okay to say no. I have found myself, many times, caught up in moments where a no was needed, but was nowhere to be found.
It was a beautiful, peaceful morning when I was on my way to school, years ago. It was on the quiet streets of Mpumalanga where my beauty was the only thing making a noise, where a man came across my tiny self and could not help himself but to pass on his greeting from the other side of the road. He seemed to be so in love with all the stories told by my hips as they swung from the left to the right and so he came closer.
There is nothing in the world that keeps the human heart smiling more than to be respected, especially when the respect comes from a stranger. He greeted me again for the second time, and my annoyed-self replied roughly. Some of us are not really used to such respect so we are always ready to bite a neck off. Another thing about this world is one can never know where a person’s respect is coming from or where it is headed to. Sometimes, it may not be as genuine as it appears to be at first, however, that may be just me and my negative thoughts.
It is okay to be wrong sometimes, and in such cases, it is wise to admit that you were wrong and that is exactly what I did when I figured that all the man wanted was to ask for a slice of bread and nothing bad. It was sad that I did not have any food with me, or at least a few coins to help a soul in need. It was surprising how he became forceful when I told him that I had nothing on me. I could not believe the sudden change of colour on his face and the twist of his tongue, I was shocked by how his tongue grew longer and sharper the more we kept on arguing.
It was not long before he began to grab me. Who the hell did he think he was to come to me thinking he could just hold me like he was holding an animal? That man came to me wearing the faces of good men; men that don’t exist, it took just one conversation for him to rip off those faces and reveal his ugly self. He pushed me aside, next to a tree and began to rip my shirt buttons off, he ripped my pants and my soul apart too. My tiny self tried hard to fight, but sometimes in the process of trying too hard, we die inside; many parts of me died.
If only my vagina had a voice, perhaps it would be loud enough for him to understand that a no means no. I could say no with my mouth, but that man stole every no from my throat when he strangled me and roughly shoved himself into my soul, in and out! Just when he was about to ejaculate… I woke up.
A dead part of me found it’s breath again when I realized that it was all just a dream. A dream that made me realise that sometimes, not every good face is genuine, sometimes it is just pretence and the truth is always revealed when the place of comfort is reached.
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