I was a naive young boy. I had never met anybody in person before because of my sick mother-not sick as in bed sick but literally insane.

I’ve never gone to school since birth. All I was allowed to do is ‘live’ in my bedroom and only come out when I need something to eat or drink.

My life at the time felt normal, especially when I was still very young but as I grew older and reached my teenage years a sudden, uncontrollable urge of curiosity possessed me.

I was only 16 when it began but I could not go out because my mother would lock me inside this house, which had no source of escape let alone any windows to escape from, in fact my room was on the upper floor and I could not possibly jump from there, else I’d die.

“I need to escape this hell.” I would remind myself, almost feeling as if I’m as crazy as my mother.
“But how?” I’d then snap myself into that reality of just living here, watch TV, bath, sleep, eat, you name it.

I didn’t even have a phone. The reason I knew that even exists is because TV portrays it all. However, there was only one window I’d see through the ‘real world’ with. It was the only window in my bedroom and everyday I’d watch through, seeing different people living ‘normal lives’.

I always wondered if my mother simply hated me or was just ‘protecting me from the real world’ like she’d often say. She’d tell me that the real world is venomous.

Even if that was the case, I wanted to leave this world of misery and loneliness. Besides, if the world out there was so ugly, why would she still go out there? Oh well… I guess I’ll never know.